This Love
by kaeh96
Summary: Remy Hadley and Allison Cameron are a force to be reckoned with. Rated M for non-explicit mature themes and some strong language.
1. Where it all began

**A/N: Well I am broadening my horizons. I finished "House" in late October and I'm absolutely in love...and Cadley/Camteen is my weakness. I'm going to use a few episodes in this story, so you'll recognize them, but for many reasons I've changed a lot of the details. (I mean it's an AU so of course everything is different haha). I've already written the first two chapters of this story, so here's the first, and I'll probably post the second later tonight or tomorrow. Please please talk to me and tell me what you think.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned House Cadley would have been canon like right away okay**

* * *

"_I fucking hate how you have the ability to make my heart drop and get butterflies all at once,_

_You are the most poisonous and beautiful thing I've ever come across,_

_And I will never be the same after you."_

_-Unknown_

* * *

_2008_

Allison Cameron poured the last bit of the wine bottle she'd been working on for the past twenty minutes into the glass sitting on the coffee table in front of her. Whatever it was she'd put on TV nearly an hour ago was now just background noise as the alcohol drowned out everything except what she wanted it to.

_'__Screw Chase.'_ she thought as she gulped her last glass, nearly slamming it back on the table as anger filled her veins again. How _dare_ he make her feel guilty for dumping him? She knew he never really loved her, at first their relationship was just sex and pretty soon he had bought her a ring, and she'd never meant for it to get that far. '_I should have put my foot down when he wanted to start living together.'_ She remembered his drawers in her dresser, and how his last words to her had stung despite her relief of this whole disaster ending,

"_Let me know when I can come get my things."_

She stood up to go get something harder to drink, and quickly found her favorite liquor- Black Magic brandy. Not bothering with a glass, she grabbed the bottle out of the cabinet and sat back down on the couch. She remembered how he asked her if she was still in love with House-and how Cuddy had proceeded to assume the same. "Idiots." she whispered to herself.

She'd always had a tendency to fall in love with those that were out of her reach-first it was house, and now it was that pretty brunette with those big ice blue eyes. God, she hated how House would only call her Thirteen, and to Cuddy she was "Dr. Hadley". Cameron knew that Thirteen could never love her back-everyone thought she was straight, including herself until the first time she'd actually talked to the younger doctor.

As pain hit her chest, Cameron took another gulp of the warm liquor. She wanted-no, needed, to be numb until she passed out. It was before midnight, so she knew that she would pass out in time to wake up on time for work. Then, she remembered that she was working the fourteen hour night shift tomorrow-all the more reason for her to spend the next couple hours finishing the large bottle. She sat there and drank until she was so numb she couldn't swallow anymore, before finally passing out on the couch with the TV still blaring.

* * *

Cameron woke up at noon the next day-just four hours until her shift started. She groaned, turned the TV off, cleaned up everything from the previous night, and made her way to the shower. Knowing she wouldn't like what she saw when she looked in the mirror, she avoided looking in it at all costs. Her body ached as she stripped, and she took a long moment under the hot water to let it relax her muscles. She scrubbed herself furiously, as if punishing herself while also trying to metaphorically scrub away Chase. She remembered something she'd learned in high school biology-that your body completely replaces all it's cells in approximately seven years, and she allowed the fact to bring her comfort.

'_Six years, three hundred sixty four days til he's really off my body.'_

* * *

The ER was quiet-typical for a Wednesday night. She'd gotten lucky and had managed to avoid seeing anyone on House's current or former team on her way in. While Cameron had always loved working for House, she was glad she'd left for the ER. The ER was her escape, she could get lost in the rush of patients or updating charts-she didn't have to think, she could just trust her instincts, and do, do whatever needed to be done at that very moment in time.

She was finishing her twelfth chart and third cup of coffee when she heard a familiar voice talking to the EMT's as a gurney rolled in.

"Dr. Cameron, we need you over here!" She heard one of the nurses call her.

Whatever Cameron was expecting, it wasn't this.

There was Thirteen spitting facts to the EMT's as a young brunette was unconscious on the gurney. It was three AM, which meant Thirteen and the strange woman had been spending the night together. Cameron snapped back to reality as she realized that this woman needed her help,

"What happened?"

Thirteen looked at Cameron with an embarrassed look of shame on her face,

"Young female, mid to late twenties went unconscious after a seizure following sexual activity."

Cameron gulped and noticed that the woman was waking up, she softened her voice and tried to lighten her expression as best she could,

"Hi, I'm Dr. Cameron, you're in the hospital." Cameron looked up at Thirteen, "What's her name?"

Thirteen paused for a moment, before finally stating,

"I don't know."

Cameron sighed, and went to work on the poor woman. She reeked of alcohol-as did Thirteen, so she hung a banana bag and suggested Thirteen do the same. She ordered a tox screen and started a chart. She skipped the name line for the time being, and watched Thirteen out of the corner of her eye as the younger doctor sat on a hospital bed next to her lover for the night and started an IV on herself.

After Cameron finished the chart until she could run further tests, she looked to see that the patient seemed to be doing better, so she made her way over to get more information. She smiled, ignoring Thirteen, and looked at her temporary patient,

"Hi, I'm Dr. Cameron, could you tell me your name?"

The woman looked slightly scared-which was good, she was less likely to lie if she was afraid.

"Spencer Turner."

Cameron scribbled the name at the top of the chart hastily,

"Okay Spencer, do you think you could tell me what happened tonight? Try and recall as much as you can, it might be difficult because you suffered a seizure, but try your best."

Cameron knew she would hate hearing the details of what Thirteen had been doing with this woman, but it was needed for an accurate medical evaluation. Spencer looked at her and told Cameron everything she could,

"Well, we uh went back to Remy's place-both of us were pretty drunk. Then we took some ecstasy, and as soon as it kicked in we…slept together. And then…I don't remember, until like ten minutes ago."

Cameron nodded, noting the drugs and alcohol on Spencer's chart.

"Thank you, this was helpful. As soon as that IV bag is finished, we're going to send you up to our diagnostics department for some tests."

Spencer lightened her expression,

"Thank you, sorry if this was all a hassle."

Spencer's politeness was pissing Cameron off-she wanted to have no positive association with this woman, she just wanted for her to be another face with a problem that needed to be fixed without any consequences. Pushing her emotions aside, Cameron simply smiled and turned around to Thirteen,

"Dr. Hadley, I suggest that as soon as you sober up, you go get some rest in the lounge, then go home and freshen up, and be here when House needs you. I won't tell him anything that isn't relevant to this case, okay?"

Thirteen seemed relieved, and her eyes sent rushes of kindness through Cameron's body,

"Thank you, for everything."

Cameron couldn't stay upset with her, it was just impossible, so she squeezed the younger woman on the shoulder and walked away. She knew Thirteen was a private person, and that any personal detail kept secret-especially from House, who was relentless for having a need to get into everyone's business-was bonus points for the very small relationship Cameron and Thirteen shared.

Cameron glanced over at Spencer, and questioned why Thirteen was doing this to herself-especially with women who weren't nearly as pretty as Thirteen herself.

'_Someone like her shouldn't sell herself short, she deserves better.'_

She shook off all her heavy thoughts, and retreated to the main ER desk to escape again to the flow of paperwork that was calling her name.


	2. Longing and consequences

**A/N: Here's the next chapter! I sent this to a few friends and they gave me really sweet feedback, and I appreciate it! **

**Disclaimer: If I owned House I probably wouldn't be writing ****fanfiction.**

* * *

_"__One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can't utter."_

_-James Earl Jones_

* * *

Remy Hadley knew she was in big trouble, and that she was going to walk in to a room full of staring eyes, and she knew that there was no way in hell House was going hold back with his questions. She mustered up all her courage as she walked into the large room, making a beeline for her seat. She was somewhat relieved that it was just Kutner and Taub that were already present, it gave her a few minutes to explain herself to her friends before she had to face Foreman's judging and House's pestering. After their silence was too much, she took a deep breath, and spat out the facts as quickly as she could,

"House is going to come in with a new case, and I just wanted to explain before we started working-the case is this girl, Spencer, she had a seizure and collapsed last night…I was with her. House is going to get in my business and he's probably going to relish in this when Cameron gives the case to him, so I just wanted to give you guys a warning, and please, don't let Foreman-and especially House-know any details, okay?"

They both looked at her with wide eyes-but there was no judgement. She knew Kutner didn't really care what she did in her private life, and Taub had his own share of drama so he didn't really have the time to get into his coworkers'-even if they were friends.

As if on cue, Foreman walked through the large glass door, said good morning to them, and took his usual place at the seat completely opposite House's.

"Do you guys know if there's a new case?" He asked them somewhat anxiously, but before any of them could say anything, House came limping in with the eagerness of a child that had just gotten a new toy.

'_He probably came as fast as he could when Cameron gave him the file.'_ Thirteen figured to herself.

"Twenty-six year old female, has a seizure after sex. Reports dehydration, exhaustion, oh and a case of Thirteen's hands all over her body."

Thirteen stared at House as she felt everyone's eyes land on her. Foreman-of course-was the first to question,

"You were with her last night?"

Thirteen could barely manage a nod, and willed for House to just let everything out.

"Patient has seen lots of doctors before-they're all convinced she's fine, clearly she's not. Tox screen showed traces of alcohol and ecstasy."

Foreman nearly interrupted House, and his gaze quickly went back to Thirteen,

"Wait, were you doing drugs too?"

She paused, knowing that if she didn't lie it would not only lead to immense amounts of shame but it would also risk her medical license,

"Not diagnostically relevant. Look, she's dehydrated from drinking too much and she's tired because she parties 'til three AM."

House stared at her, picking up on her motives and not buying a single ounce of her lie,

"But you're not tired. Sorry, not buying it. Thirteen, go stick a needle in your girlfriend's pelvis-no that, wasn't a euphemism-suck out some marrow…that one was."

Thirteen rolled her eyes and practically ran out of the room to go run the test. She had almost, _almost_ snapped at him by saying that Spencer was far from being her girlfriend-she hadn't counted on seeing her ever again after the previous night, and for that precise reason, she knew House was going to make her run every single test they had to perform.

'_Just my luck.'_

* * *

Cameron awoke to the oh so familiar sound of House's cane across the floor of the doctor's lounge, where she'd been asleep since she gave House Spencer's medical information that morning. She looked at the clock, although she didn't really need it because her grumbling stomach told her what time of day it was-1:27 PM-right in the middle of her lunch hour.

"You know sleeping doesn't mean you can avoid all your problems." House called to her as he poked around in the refrigerator, most likely looking for Wilson's lunch.

"Maybe not, but at least I can put off dealing with them."

House turned back to her with a plastic container of some sort of pasta salad in his hands,

"Lucky you surgeons and heads of the ER work such weird hours, right? I mean I can just imagine how _awkward_ it would be if you had to see Chase every single hour of every single day and night just like the old days."

Cameron hardened her expression,

"House, quit messing with me and just say what you think I need to hear-or at least what you want me to hear, I need to eat lunch and my next shift starts at three, I don't have all the time in the world for speculation."

House gave her an over-dramatized confused expression,

"Silly Cameron, you think if I actually had anything important to say that more people would listen."

She rolled her eyes and stood up, ignoring House's stare on her. She needed to retreat as fast as she could, so she could avoid seeing anyone else on his team-especially Thirteen.

* * *

Cameron finally made it to her office with a salad and a bowl of soup, and as she spent the next hour wrapping up the paperwork from her previous shift, she came to the realization that House hadn't pestered her-yet-about how she'd avoided asking about how Spencer was doing, when normally, when she brought House a case, she worked alongside the team to diagnose the patient and oversee their care. She knew that when this case was over he was going to try and weasel an answer out of her, and honestly, she didn't know what she would say to him.

'_I better start thinking of a lie, and fast.'_


	3. Skinny love

**A/N: Merry Christmas guys! This story is coming along quite nicely. I'm surprising myself.**

**Disclaimer: Yeah yeah everything belongs to Fox whatever.**

* * *

_"__There's like a million different ways to say 'I love you'_

_'__put your seatbelt on'_

_'__watch your step'_

_'__get some rest'_

_…__you just gotta listen"_

_-Unknown_

* * *

The case was over on Friday-and House sent everyone home for the weekend, knowing they needed to rest. The second they were gone, he went to find Cameron. He found her in her office, scribbling through her last bit of paperwork for the day.

"Let's talk about sex." He said as he made his way in, sitting in the blue chair on the opposite side of the desk.

"Whatever you want House just spit it out, I have a shift tomorrow and I would like to get out of here ASAP."

He sighed,

"Case is over."

She eyed him,

"I figured. Why don't you go home?"

She was pushing him away-so he only dug deeper. He ignored her question,

"You didn't once ask about the patient."

She put her pen down and made eye contact with him,

"So?"

"So, whenever you bring a case you always ask for constant updates on the patient, sometimes you even hover like the annoying miniature Cuddy that you are and help solve the case, but not this one."

She tried to hide what she was thinking and just looked at him harder-which of course led to an eye roll.

"_And _something tells me it has to do with what the patient and Thirteen were doing before they came running to the ER."

"Why would I care what Thirteen does in her personal life?" Cameron tried lying through a question.

"Do you think I'm _that _stupid? I thought you were better than that. You always care when someone-especially someone you work with-is doing stupid things like doing drugs and drinking too much and taking home a different stranger every night…unless you've been doing the same thing. You're too busy and too tense to have been having sex with a different person every night…you would never touch drugs, which leaves option number three-drinking too much. Let me guess…tequila?"

Cameron widened her eyes at him-and instead of arguing, corrected him.

"Brandy, actually. And wine-red."

His eyes flickered with satisfaction-but he wasn't done.

"Still, just because you've been keeping yourself warm with adult juice instead of the Australian doesn't explain why you weren't constantly pestering and pining over this case." He paused, then looked back up at her, "Oh my god-you swing both ways too, don't you? I guess Thirteen isn't the only one who's taken a patient named Spencer home before."

Cameron nearly had a heart attack over how close House was to figuring her out-yet so far. So she tried to throw him off even more,

"Yeah sure, that's it." She scoffed sarcastically at him.

"I'm leaving, House. See you on Monday."

She closed her last file, gathered her things, and left-but of course not without turning off the lights and closing House in. She was just about to lock it when he pushed it open-nearly knocking her down.

"Goodbye blondie!" He called as he strode away.

* * *

Cameron was on her second glass of brandy as she decided that instead of having Chase come to her place to take his stuff back-she'd give it back herself. So, she grabbed a bin, went to her dresser, and started looking for fragile things in the drawer-all clear. She pulled the drawer all the way out, and emptied it's contents into the bin. It felt good-like she was ridding Chase from her life piece by piece.

'_And making room for Remy.'_

* * *

Cameron _never_ got hangovers-but this morning she woke up with a pretty bad headache, and the first thing she did when she came in to the ER was make a beeline for her office and take some painkillers. She waited a few minutes after having a couple cups of water, and went to face the day.

"Dr. Cameron?" She turned around as the voice she recognized so well said her name,

"Thirteen! What are you doing here?"

The brunette blushed,

"House and Cuddy made me. Punishment."

Cameron nodded, remembering how she overheard Foreman talking to Chase about Thirteen's temporary firing.

"Alright, go ahead and tend to whatever catches your eye. We probably won't be seeing anything interesting until tonight, but if you can get to urgent cases coming in faster than anyone else, feel free to oversee them."

Thirteen smiled at her,

"Okay, thanks."

Cameron smiled back and nodded to dismiss her.

"Dr. Cameron, could you go get some more syringes from the upstairs supply closet? I know we'd normally ask an intern but you're not busy yet." The nurse running the desk spoke quickly, Cameron's dominance over her ER very apparent.

"Of course! I'll be right back."

Cameron headed to the elevator and made her way up. She walked down the long, empty halls-she wasn't used to it being this quiet, and while it was eerie, it was also slightly comforting. She strolled and took in the solitude until she turned the corner and was thrown off guard by something-no, some_one_ on the ground. She immediately ran to them-closer inspection showed it was an old man in a hospital gown.

"Sir? Sir! Can you hear me?" He was struggling to breathe, and when she checked his pulse it was extremely faint, as if his chest was closed up. '_Cardiac arrest.'_

There was no crash cart anywhere nearby-but there was an AED on the wall five feet away. She darted to it and knew she didn't have time to use her key or punch in her code to get it, so she took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and punched through the glass. It was a million times more painful than she thought it would be, and it took all her will to not cry out in pain. She ignored the blood that immediately started to gush from her hand, and she grabbed the defibrillator. Hastily, she placed the pads on his chest, charged the machine, and shocked his heart, immediately placing her stethoscope over his heart after the shock ended.

She let out a sigh of relief as she heard that his heartbeat was strong, and she paged for a nurse to come take him back to his room. She looked at her hand-and was instantly thankful she wasn't a surgeon. As soon as the nurse came, she practically ran back to the ER, cradling her hand-which felt like it was on fire.

"Cameron, what the _actual_ hell happened?" Thirteen's eyes widened as she looked at the blonde's mutilated hand.

"I uh, punched through some glass to get an AED. Could you?"

"Yeah, come here, let's sit down."

Thirteen walked with Cameron to a bed, and immediately got to work on her hand. Cameron felt tears stinging her eyes as the pain was overwhelming.

"Okay, I gotta stop this bleeding first, and that's gonna hurt-a lot. Are you ready?" Cameron watched as Thirteen got a gloved handful of gauze pads, and nodded.

"Okay, on three. One, two-" Without warning, she pressed the gauze to Cameron's hand.

"Hey! What happened to three?"

Thirteen smiled playfully at her,

"This way, you don't expect it. It hurts less that way. If I'd waited until three, you would have flexed your muscles, making tension, which makes the pressure seem a lot stronger than it really is."

Cameron admired her thinking, and she knew that this theory was proven-it was the exact same reason why children were distracted when getting shots. If they don't see the needle, then there's no fear, and with no fear, pain is reduced immensely.

"I gotta say I'm impressed-I didn't know you had a badass side."

Cameron smirked at Thirteen's remark,

"There's lots of things you don't know about me."

Thirteen looked at her with a devilish look in her eyes.

"Alright, you finally stopped bleeding, now let's take a look…"

Cameron watched as Thirteen delicately examined her hand, her long fingers gently touching the non-cut up parts of Cameron's skin.

"Damn, you've got some glass in here. Alright, I know we normally wait until you're about to get stitches but I'm going to numb your hand now."

Cameron gave her a thankful glance as she fidgeted for the syringe of lidocaine.

"Alright, small pinch." Cameron winced slightly as the needle broke her already sore skin.

"It's going to feel weird…having glass get pulled out but not being in pain." She commented. Thirteen nodded in agreement as she studied Cameron's hand further.

"Alright, it should be numb now. Ready?"

Cameron nodded, and relaxed as Thirteen picked up the tweezers and got to work.

They were silent except for the sound of the glass shards dropping into the metal tray.

"Okay, one…last piece." Thirteen told the blonde as she pulled the last shard.

"How many?" Cameron asked.

Thirteen looked into the tray and quickly counted and then smiled,

"Take a wild guess." Her smile deepened as they made eye contact.

"Thirteen. Guess god has a sense of humor."

They chuckled and Thirteen opened a suitor kit. Cameron became entranced as she watched Thirteen's skilled hands repair her own. It was amazing to watch this beautiful young woman making such beautiful work-Cameron probably wouldn't have any scars, at least not from the stitches. She had to have four of the gashes on her hand stitched, and three more needed skin glue.

"All done! I'm just going to swab it with alcohol one more time and then wrap it. Take an anti-inflammatory, and ice it when you get home…why I'm telling you this, I'm not sure I mean of course you know because you're a doctor but I don't know I'll just…stop rambling"

'_Smooth. She probably thinks you're crazy now.'_

Cameron snapped out of her trance as Thirteen gave her the instructions.

"Oh no, it's fine. I think we all forget, and we want to take care of each other. Thank you, so much. You probably could have been a really good surgeon, you're good with your hands."

Thirteen smiled as she dressed Cameron's hand,

"You're right, except that in a decade I won't be able to be still."

Cameron froze, and felt _so_ guilty for what she'd just said.

"Don't worry, I forget sometimes too. Well, not really, but honestly it's fine. I do agree with you, I was even told in med school that I'd make a great surgeon. I've always been good at this kind of thing-but don't ask me to handwrite an essay for you, or paint a masterpiece-I'm terrible with tools like that."

Cameron relaxed as Thirteen made fun of herself,

"I'm sure that's not true, it's probably not as bad as you think it is."

"Maybe."

They went silent again, and Cameron couldn't take it-so she went for casual small talk,

"Doing anything fun this weekend?"

Thirteen shook her head,

"Sadly not. You?"

"Well, I don't know if you would call it fun, but I have to go to an emergency medicine conference in New York tomorrow. I get to take the ferry boat." She giggled a little. "I come back Monday morning."

Thirteen looked at her,

"Well, try and take it in while you can. It's not much but it is time away from this place."

She finished wrapping Cameron's hand, and started to clean up the station.

"Thirteen?"

She looked up at Cameron again.

"Thank you, really. I couldn't have asked for anyone better."

Thirteen gave her a light smile,

"You're welcome, Allison."

Cameron didn't even respond to Thirteen's use of her first name, she just smiled back and walked back to her office. She'd loved the way Thirteen's voice sounded using her name-she wish she'd do it more often.

_'__She called me Allison.'_ She felt like a little girl again-and it was the best medicine.


	4. Chaos

**A/N: New chapter! This one is super long...but I figure the more the merrier...right?**

**Disclaimer: What do you think**

* * *

_"__Disaster is a natural part of my evolution towards tragedy and dissolution."_

_-Chuck Palahniuk_

* * *

The first thing Thirteen did on Monday morning was respond to a 911 triage page-and when she finally arrived at the hospital, she widened her eyes at the clusterfuck that was the ER.

'_Holy shit.'_

"What happened?!" She asked Kutner who practically ran past her with both arms full with supplies.

"Ferry boat crash. Go check in, then pick a triage team-you can either stay here or go to the scene. Taub is going while Foreman, Chase, and I are staying here." Kutner had to yell the last part of his answer as he was practically being pulled away by the crowd that seemed to be going in a thousand different directions at once.

Thirteen's heart started to pound as she recalled Cameron telling her that she was coming back that morning from New York on a ferry boat.

"Where's Dr. Cameron?" She asked the nurse running the desk as she signed in.

"We're not sure-that's part of why this place is a mess. She hasn't responded to her page and we called her, but it went straight to voicemail."

'_So her cell is either dead or at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean. Or turned off.'_

Thirteen turned back to the crowd, took a deep sigh, and fought her way to get to the side where the teams that were going on scene were meeting. She had her arm grabbed more than a few times, and she nearly got stuck with a needle-twice. Finally, she made it to the ambulance entrance.

"Thirteen!" Taub called to her.

"Hey, so what's the deal?"

"Dr. Hadley, are you going to come with us to do on-sight triage?" Smith-one of the ambulance drivers and an EMT-caught her attention.

She simply nodded.

"Alright, grab a coat and a bag, we're heading out in a few minutes. We're the second team to go out. You know the drill-green tags for people who are okay and can leave, yellow for those that need urgent medical attention, and red for deceased."

She took a heavy paramedic's jacket and supplies, and went back to stand next to Taub.

"So all this chaos is because they're prepping for these people to come back?"

Taub nodded,

"Perks of being the hospital closest to the Princeton bay. Once the people who don't need as much care are stabilized, we're sending them to Princeton General."

Thirteen felt her heart beating faster, and her palms were sweating-she _so_ hoped Cameron would turn up soon, and in perfect condition.

"Alright let's head out! We're taking numbers three through eight!"

Thirteen and Taub headed into the lot, and sat down next to each other on the ride out. Taub noticed how tense she was, and she saw him look at her with concern out of the corner of her eye-he didn't even have to ask the question.

"Cameron is supposed to be taking a ferry boat this morning. It would just…suck if someone we knew was hurt, or worse."

Taub nodded, and they were silent.

* * *

"Get going! Work as quickly and efficiently as you can, and pace yourselves-some of you may be out here until dark."

Thirteen shivered as the cool early winter air blew in her face, and she followed Smith's orders. She'd never seen such a mess in person-there were boat parts that looked as if they'd exploded scattered everywhere, and there had to be at least five hundred victims right in front of her. She took a left, and got to work, subconsciously reminding herself to keep her eyes peeled for long blonde curls.

The first person Thirteen crouched next to was a man who's face was so swollen even his family might not recognize him. Before she said a word, she checked for a pulse-nothing. She continued to take her stethoscope and press it to his chest-no breath sounds, no heartbeat. He was dead. She grabbed a red bracelet out of her bag, wrote the date and time and started to search his pockets for an ID. She quickly found his wallet-and in it, his driver's license.

"Sorry Richard."

She then wrote his name on the bracelet, placed it around his wrist, and continued on. The next person she assessed was a woman-she was pretty, with red hair and flawless porcelain skin. She seemed okay-with the exception of a large gash going all the way down the outside of her leg, and she seemed to be in excruciating pain.

"Ma'am? My name is Dr. Hadley, you were in an accident. Where does it hurt?"

The woman winced and barely managed to communicate,

"My head, it feels like it's going to explode."

"Okay, you probably have a concussion. I'm going to bandage your leg and elevate your head, and we're going to get you in an ambulance soon so you can go to Princeton General by the end of the day. Do you understand?"

The woman nodded.

"Great. What's your name?"

"Rebecca McDermott."

"Alright Rebecca, hold on for me. Do you have anymore pain besides your head and your leg?"

Rebecca shook her head, and Thirteen moved to her leg. She cut the woman's pant leg open and used a gauze pad with alcohol to cleanse the wound, then she wrapped it in thick dressing. She then proceeded to take a couple more sheets of dressing, folded them, and set them under Rebecca's head. As she filled out a yellow bracelet, she flinched as a helicopter flew past them. She was just standing up when a blonde head caught her eye. The mystery blonde was about Cameron's height, and she had an identical frame.

"Allison?" Thirteen rushed over to the blonde and grabbed her shoulder. The stranger jumped at her touch,

"No, my name is Sarah."

Thirteen sighed,

"I'm sorry Sarah. My name is Dr. Hadley, are you hurt?"

"No, but I would like to go look for my husband."

Thirteen pulled out a green bracelet, filled out the information she knew, and handed it and her marker to Sarah to fill out the rest,

"Go back towards the city, away from the dock, and you'll see a station of police that are taking names of missing people. Show them your bracelet, tell them your husband's name, and they'll handle it from there-and again, I'm sorry. I'm looking for my friend and from the back you look like her."

Sarah smiled,

"It's perfectly fine, thank you so much."

Thirteen nodded and turned back to the chaos. Another team came flooding in, and the first thirty people in front of her were either dead or were already being tended to.

'_Screw this, I'm finding Allison.'_

She started to speed walk past everyone, looking for Cameron.

"Allison! Allison, where are you?! Dr. Cameron?"

She sped up to a run until she stopped at a pile of wreckage. She walked along it, looking for blonde hair sticking out.

"Allison!"

She stopped when she heard a groan that vaguely sounded like Cameron's voice. She scanned for the source of the sound, and nearly cried when she finally found the older doctor.

"Allison! Jesus, this is a complete disaster."

Cameron had a long, thick metal pole crushing her chest, and she had burns everywhere.

"Okay, I have to lift this pole-and it's probably going to hurt when I get this pressure off your ribs. Ready?"

Cameron nodded.

"Okay, here goes nothing."

Thirteen placed her hands under the pole, and lifted with all her might. She got it a few inches away from Cameron's body, and quickly darted to get it away from them. She finally got it a good two feet away from where she needed to work, and dropped it on the ground.

"Where does it hurt?"

Cameron was gasping as she caught her breath,

"My…ribs. Arm too, and my torso."

Thirteen looked at Cameron's already cut up hand,

"Yeah, I think that injured hand and wrist are probably now sprained, maybe even broken. Your ribs were crushed so I'm sure some of those broke too, and I'm going to order an ultrasound to see if there's any internal bleeding because I can't examine your skin-it's covered in burns. I know it hurts, but I'm not going to leave you until we get back to the hospital, alright?"

Cameron started to say something, but instantly started to choke.

"Shit, I think your left lung collapsed!"

Thirteen dug into the bag for a needle, pulled up Cameron's shirt, and jabbed the needle into her lung-and was relieved when Cameron's breathing eased again.

"Your whole left side is a mess-you've got more bruises and burns there than I can count, that arm is a magnet for injuries, and I'd bet at least half your lefthand ribs are cracked or broken."

Cameron laughed a little as Thirteen started to fill out a yellow bracelet,

"Remy, please-don't leave me. Stay with me."

Thirteen made eye contact with her,

"I won't-I promise." She put the bracelet on Cameron's good arm, and looked up, "We need some help over here! Emergency transport please!"

She sighed as no one heard her, and looked back at Cameron,

"You must be freezing, and something tell's me we're going to be here for awhile."

Thirteen took off her coat and her grey cardigan-leaving her in just a short sleeved shirt. She took her sweater and placed it over Cameron's upper body, and pulled her coat back on. She sat back, and was shocked when Cameron's cold hand grabbed hers. She gripped it tightly, as if willing the warmth to help heal her friend just a little bit faster.

* * *

Nearly an hour later, a duo of paramedics reached them with a gurney.

The younger one approached them first,

"Dr. Hadley, and-oh god, Dr. Cameron. Is she alright?"

"For now but if you don't get us in a damn ambulance that answer might change."

The pair carefully set Cameron on the gurney, and made their way to the edge of the crowd-where an ambulance was waiting for them.

The older paramedic stopped Thirteen before she could follow Cameron into the ambulance,

"I heard you say 'us'?"

Thirteen rolled her eyes,

"Yes, I'll be overseeing Dr. Cameron's care. Now can I please get in? It's freezing out here."

He nodded her in, and she instantly took Cameron's hand again. The ride back to the hospital was silent-and Thirteen was somewhat grateful for the fact. She could only imagine the chaos that would uprise when Cameron would be rolled into her own ER-especially in her current condition.

* * *

Thirteen's prediction was right-nearly every person they'd asked to help froze for a good minute before snapping back and obeying orders. They took Cameron into a trauma room, and Thirteen watched on as she told them everything that was wrong and all the tests that were needed.

"No! Do the ultrasound and then treat her burns-you need to check for internal bleeding, because if you treat the burns and then in an hour she's coughing up blood because one of her ribs shattered and perforated her lung, it's going to be all our asses that take the fall, not to mention that all the trauma surgeons are already busy with cases and we don't need to add to their load with something that's totally preventable!" The physicians all listened to her, and Thirteen held her breath as they checked both her lungs.

"All clear Dr. Hadley. Do you mind if we go over her uterus to double check for pregnancy while we're at this?"

Thirteen sighed-they could have been doing better things with their time,

"Go for it."

Nothing. Thirteen was relieved that everything going on inside Cameron was alright-for now. They treated Cameron's burns then took her for an urgent CT. After everything was through, Cameron was admitted and taken up to the ICU-with Thirteen practically glued to her side.

* * *

They were silent as they awaited the results of the CT scan. Cameron couldn't take it-she needed to be distracted.

"Remy, I was so scared…I've never been in so much pain."

Thirteen looked at her, tears threatening to make their way down her cheeks,

"Damn it Allison, I thought you were dead. Don't ever scare me like that again-if something is happening just call me so I can be prepared with my own ambulance just for you, okay?"

Cameron started to cry, but she smiled and chuckled a little,

"Okay."

Thirteen smiled at her,

"You're going to be okay, and I'll be here the whole time."

They squeezed one another's hands, and jumped a little when the door opened and a radiologist with Cameron's scans in his hands walked in.

"Well Dr. Cameron, you've got seven damaged ribs-five on the left and two on the right; three breaks, two hairline fractures, one linear fracture, and one with a small crack. Also that left wrist of yours has a pretty bad break in it. Everything else looks good, but if you have any pain in your pelvis or collarbone you need to tell us, because those bones took harsh impact too, and they're more than likely bruised. We'll cast the wrist and get a brace to set your ribs, and we're going to keep you for the next twenty four hours in the general patient rooms for observation, then you can go home."

Thirteen and Cameron sighed at the relatively good news.

"Thank you, that's great." Cameron said politely, while Thirteen simply nodded her thanks.

The radiologist left, and Thirteen looked back at Cameron,

"That could have ended _so_ much worse than it did…thank goodness you're alright."

She reached over and lightly hugged Cameron, who-despite still being in pain-felt her heart go into her throat as Thirteen treated her with such immense kindness-and it was finally safe to say that they were getting close.


	5. Caring and comfort

**A/N: Hello chickadees! Here's the next chapter! I know the last chapter was...scary. I thought I'd make up for it with lots of nice things. Also, please review and talk to me, it drives me crazy to not know what readers think. Also, I've made a cover image, but my image manager hasn't been working recently, so I'm sorry for the lack of a cover photo :(**

**Disclaimer: No. Just no.**

* * *

_"Some people care too much, I think it's called love"_

_-Winnie the Pooh_

* * *

"Dr. Cameron, are you ready to go home?" Lisa Cuddy asked as she walked in while Thirteen and Cameron were getting all of the blonde's stuff put together. Cameron smiled at her boss,

"More than ready. I know it was only a day but it felt like forever."

"Good. Is anyone going to be with you to help you settle back home?"

"Yeah, actually Rem-er, Thirteen, is going to stay with me for a few days." She replied, motioning towards Thirteen.

Cuddy's eyes went wide,

"Really? Well that's very kind."

"Yes, really. We discussed it this morning."

Thirteen felt awkward-they were talking about her like she wasn't really there.

"Dr. Hadley, may I please speak to you for a moment?"

Thirteen followed Cuddy into the hall, shutting the door behind them.

"Dr. Hadley, are you sure you can handle this? You know she has new medications to take, and that she suffered a traumatic event? The nights following a big event like this…are rough. Not to mention she'll probably jump at the sound of every airplane or-"

"I can handle it. I am a doctor, and I'm her friend. We'll be okay." Thirteen tried her best to assure their boss.

Cuddy still looked skeptical,

"Alright. But if you need any help, I want you to call me. Understand?"

"Yes ma'am."

Cuddy nodded and walked back to her office. Thirteen shook off her judgement, and went back into the room to get Cameron.

"Let's get out of here."

* * *

Thirteen's stomach growled as she helped Cameron put away her things in her spacious condo,

"Wanna have dinner?"

Cameron looked at her and nodded,

"Yeah, let's just order Chinese food. I'm going to go take a shower."

"Okay, let me know if you need anything." Thirteen called after her and picked up the phone.

Their order was being finalized when Thirteen heard Cameron's voice,

"Hey Remy? Could you come help me really quick?"

"Yeah sure, one second." Thirteen confirmed their order, hung up, and went to go see what Cameron needed. The water was running and the bathroom door was cracked.

"Allison, I'm coming in."

Cameron was topless with just her bra and underwear on. She'd peeled her bandages off her burns and had taken off the brace for her ribs.

"Hey, sorry to bother you-could you put the waterproof dressing on my burns? It's just hard to reach on my back…"

"Of course." Thirteen walked over to her, picked up the dressing, and started to wrap it around the shorter woman's slender torso from behind her so as to save what dignity Cameron still had.

"Uh, could you…?" She asked Cameron, gesturing to her bra. The blonde unhooked it from the back and dropped it on the ground, and Thirteen held her breath as she wrapped the dressing over the burn that covered most of Cameron's left breast.

"There, you're all set. Don't forget to take your antibiotic for those burns at dinner."

Cameron nodded,

"Thank you. I'll be out in about twenty minutes, go ahead and make yourself comfortable."

Thirteen rubbed her good arm, and walked out, closing the door behind her.

* * *

A big meal, a couple glasses of wine, and many hours later, they were ready for bed.

"I'll take the couch, if you want." Thirteen offered as she followed Cameron into the master bedroom.

"No! I mean…I want you to stay…with me. If that's okay." Cameron exclaimed as she took out all the pills she needed to take before bed.

Thirteen smiled,

"That sounds great."

Cameron turned out the lights after she finished taking her meds, and they slid under the covers on opposite sides of the bed. Thirteen laid on her back in silence for a moment, looking up at the ceiling.

"Allison, can I ask you something?"

Cameron turned to face the brunette, letting out a small groan of pain as she did,

"Yeah-of course."

"How scared were you…in the crash? I mean, did you think you would…how did you think it would end?"

Cameron thought about the question,

"I was scared I could die, but then I didn't. Then, I was in a lot of pain, and I was crushed under that pole, and I was scared again that I would die. And then…you showed up, and even though I was still under that pole and in really bad condition, I knew I wasn't going to die. I don't know Remy, I can't explain it…you have this effect on me, like…the world could be ending, but then you're there and suddenly it's not."

Thirteen's heart swelled at how fond Cameron was of her,

"Allison, that's probably one of the sweetest things anyone's said to me. You make me feel…like I can truly smile a real smile-and I haven't felt that way in a very long time, especially not since I got my diagnosis."

Cameron moved closer to Thirteen-close enough that Thirteen could feel her warmth but not quite close enough that they were touching. It was a line Cameron didn't want to cross-not yet, because she didn't know how Thirteen would react. But Thirteen would cross it for her-so she moved to Cameron, closing the gap between them. Cameron then rested her head on Thirteen's shoulder, and Thirteen reached across her own stomach so she could lightly rest her hand on Cameron's side. Cameron fell asleep first-partially due to her medications and partially due to the exhausting 48 hours she'd just experienced. Thirteen let the rhythm of Cameron's breathing soothe her, and pretty soon she was asleep herself.

* * *

Thirteen nearly fell as she tripped over a large bin when she was stumbling to the bathroom the following morning.

"What the hell?"

Cameron sat up-too quickly-to see what had happened, nearly crying out in pain as she did,

"Oh I'm sorry. It's Chase's stuff, I was going to bring it to him on Tuesday but…"

"Don't sweat it. Why not have him come get it today?" Thirteen looked at Cameron with concern-she needed to heal, and having Chase's stuff there couldn't possibly be helpful.

"Really? You don't mind?"

"Not at all." Thirteen stood up and looked at her friend, "Go ahead and call him, I'm gonna take a quick shower. Get something small in your stomach and take your painkillers-and don't move too quickly."

Cameron smiled as Thirteen doctored her, "Thanks, I think I learned my lesson."

Thirteen smirked playfully and stepped into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Cameron reached over to grab the house phone out of the cradle on her nightstand, and dialed Chase's number.

* * *

Thirteen heard a knock on the door as she started to get dressed. Cuddy had given her the next few weeks off, so she pulled on an oversized sweater and black leggings and didn't bother to blow dry her hair or put on any makeup. She walked out of the bathroom and through the bedroom into the hallway, hearing faint voices in the main entryway. As she rounded the corner, she saw Cameron talking to someone in the doorway with her back turned to her home-the bin with Chase's belongings in her arms.

"Chase?" Thirteen called as she walked into the living room. His head popped up,

"Thirteen? It's a surprise to see you here."

She smiled sheepishly-she and Chase had once been good friends, but since their recent distance, they'd grown apart.

"Yeah, I was the one who uh, saved her so I volunteered to make sure she'd be alright."

"Yeah" Cameron interjected, "And besides, we're friends."

Chase nodded, and turned back to Cameron

"Great. Well, thanks for calling, feel better soon. Thirteen, it's always great to see you. See you ladies soon." He carefully took his stuff from Cameron's arms, and left.

"He was being sweet." Thirteen commented as Cameron shut the door.

"Yup, I mean he is your friend, and I know he feels bad for me, and it would be nice if we could be friends again…I'm just not ready yet."

Thirteen nodded,

"Understandable."

They paused for a second, until Thirteen heard Cameron's stomach grumble-causing them to have a small outburst of laughter. The brunette walked closer to Cameron,

"Alright, let's have some breakfast."


	6. Firsts

**A/N: Hey! Sorry it took me longer than usual to update, this chapter was very tedious to write-a lot happens, and I wanted it to be good haha. Anyways, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I would have so much power if I owned House y'all don't even know**

* * *

_"__Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."_

_-Lao Tzu_

* * *

It was the fifth night Thirteen was with Cameron-and the second time she'd been woken up by Cameron's small whimpers.

"Allison, sweetie wake up." She shook the small blonde gently, trying not to put too much pressure on her burns.

"Sorry." she whispered through a yawn.

"Don't be, I wasn't that tired anyways." Thirteen sat up in bed, Cameron turning towards her as she did.

"Come here." Thirteen opened her arms, and Cameron slid over, resting her head on Thirteen's chest.

Cameron sighed deeply as she listened to Thirteen's heartbeat,

"When will this be over?"

Thirteen paused for a moment,

"Well, your burns will heal, and you bones will too. Then, you'll start to sleep better, and things will go back to normal."

"You're going to leave?" Cameron asked, looking up at the brunette. Thirteen smiled and kissed her forehead,

"Not if you don't want me to."

"Good," Cameron said softly, "because I don't."

Thirteen's heart fluttered at Cameron took her hand and pressed a kiss to it.

"Then I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

They were watching a marathon of "Law and Order" in the living room that afternoon when Thirteen heard her phone ringing in the bedroom.

"I'll be right back." She said to Cameron, getting up as she did.

She rolled her eyes when she saw the caller ID-House.

'_Might as well get it over with.'_

"Hello"

_"__How's lesbian sex with the damaged blonde going?"_

She sighed,

"What do you want House? I know you didn't call to just check on us."

_"__Cuddy told me to call, and while I normally wouldn't bother to, I just couldn't resist invading on the privacy of my lesbians."_

"We aren't lesbians, House. And we're fine, really. Allison is feeling a lot better, and I'll be back at work in a couple weeks. Now, sorry to disappoint you, but I have to go."

She hung up, tossed her phone on the bed, and went back to the living room.

"Sorry, it was House."

Cameron rolled her eyes,

"Of course it was."

Thirteen smiled a little, and they sat for a moment, not really paying attention to the TV, but also not knowing what to say to one another.

"Hey, do you want to do something tonight? Get out of here for a little while…?" Cameron asked.

Thirteen studied her for a moment,

"Allison, are you asking me out?"

Cameron blushed, and smiled at her,

"I think I am."

They chuckled, nearly collapsing into one another.

"Why don't we go to that new Japanese steakhouse that just opened up down the road?" Cameron suggested lightly.

Thirteen looked longingly into her eyes,

"That sounds perfect."

* * *

They stepped into the warm restaurant, Thirteen draping her favorite leather jacket over her arm as they did.

"Table for two?" The hostess asked them as they walked in.

Cameron smiled and nodded, and they followed her in. The tables seated twelve people around a large grill, where chefs came and made the guests' food in front of them. They were seated at a section with a young couple that were already looking over a menu.

"What looks good to you?" Cameron asked as they picked up the plastic menus.

'_You.'_ Thirteen thought to herself.

"Hmm…steak and fried rice."

Cameron looked up at her,

"Exactly what I was thinking!"

They made eye contact and laughed, their foreheads coming together as they did. Cameron's felt like fireworks were forming where Thirteen's skin met her own.

Thirteen felt the other couple looking at them, so she slowly sat back in her seat, and they waited for a chef to arrive.

* * *

Cameron shivered as they stepped out into the nighttime air, their stomachs overly full from their meal. Thirteen saw the blonde shake out of the corner of her eye, so she handed her jacket.

"Thank you." Cameron said gratefully, taking in Thirteen's intoxicating scent as she slipped the brunette's jacket on.

"Want to go get a drink?" Thirteen asked, motioning to the small bar next door the the restaurant.

"I'd love to." Cameron smiled and walked closer to her, slipping her hand into Thirteen's.

* * *

As they sat at the bar, Thirteen studied Cameron,

"What does Allison Cameron like to drink? Hmm…whiskey?"

Cameron laughed at her,

"Close-brandy actually."

Thirteen smiled.

"I'm guessing you like…vodka?" The blonde guessed with a mischievous sparkle in her eye.

"You're exactly right."

Thirteen ordered a vodka-soda while Cameron got Black Magic on the rocks. They were silent for a moment as they sipped their drinks, until Thirteen felt Cameron's hand on her arm,

"Let's go to the table in the back corner, I want to talk about something."

Thirteen felt butterflies form in her stomach as she followed the blonde to a small table at the back of the bar.

"Allison, what's going on?" Thirteen asked, concerned, as they slid onto the hard wooden chairs.

Cameron took a deep breath-she needed to tell her friend how she really felt, because something was telling her that Thirteen felt the same way, and it was killing her to not know.

"Remy, I was serious about what I said last night. It wasn't some drug induced rant-I don't want you to leave me, ever. I have no clue what I was doing with Chase…I never loved him, it was just sex at first and I never thought we would have an actual relationship-or whatever that mess was. The truth is, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since we met. I know everyone assumes I'm straight, but I honestly don't know anything, except that I'm definitely _not_ heterosexual. I know I might be crazy-hell I know I'm crazy, but Remy, something in my gut tells me that you feel the same way…am I wrong?"

Thirteen just stared at her, completely struck by what she'd just been told.

"Oh god, I'm so stupid. I'm sorry, I always fall in love with people I have no chance with…I'm such an idiot-"

"Allison, stop." Thirteen cut her off, "No, you're not wrong-not at all. I'm just…surprised. Allison, I've been going crazy because…well, because I'm crazy for you. The reason I go out and party and pick up random girls isn't because of my Huntington's-well that's a part of it-but it's because I haven't been able to be with you. I'm sorry, I had no clue you felt this way."

Allison felt her heart go into her throat,

"Don't be sorry-ever. I should have been more clear."

Thirteen smiled at Cameron,

"Allison, I'm in love with you."

Cameron couldn't believe her ears-she had to fight back tears,

"And I'm in love with you."


	7. Swallowing pride

**A/N: Hey again! This chapter is a little bit shorter, but the next two will be quite...eventful.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned House, really, you have no idea.**

* * *

_"__Like a river flows surely to the sea, darling so it goes._

_Some things are meant to be."_

_-Elvis_

* * *

The pair had left the bar not long after their talk, and they were just getting ready for bed. They'd barely said a word to each other-Thirteen figured they could take the night to soak in what they'd admitted to one another less than an hour earlier.

Thirteen was standing in the bedroom, pulling back her covers when she felt Cameron's arms slide around her waist, and the blonde pressed the side of her face to Thirteen's shoulder blade. Thirteen took in the backwards hug, before turning around and taking the smaller woman into her arms, resting her chin in the crook of the blonde's neck. Cameron was warm, and her hair smelled like vanilla. Cameron let out a deep, content sigh, closing her eyes as she took in Thirteen's lavender scent. As they released each other after a long moment of close physical connection, Cameron pressed a kiss to Thirteen's soft cheek.

"Let's go to sleep." The smaller woman said softly, walking to her own side of the bed.

* * *

Thirteen had been laying awake for nearly an hour, her mind rushing with thoughts of how she wanted nothing more than to start making her life with Cameron. It was driving her crazy-so she broke the silence,

"Allison, are you asleep?"

The blonde rolled over to face Thirteen, not having to say a word. Thirteen moved closer to her, pressing her forehead to Cameron's.

"I can't stop thinking about what we talked about…it's crazy that this whole time, the two of us have felt the same way about each other, and yet we never said anything." Cameron spoke softly, and Thirteen truly took her words to heart.

"I've been thinking about how I can't wait to start a life-my life-with you. The fact that we have a chance is a fact that I never thought I'd live to face. It's incredible how two people can have so much in their hearts, and yet never have the bravery to do anything about it."

"I guess we got lucky, huh?" Cameron asked, Thirteen feeling the smaller woman's warm breath on her face.

"Yeah," Thirteen laughed "I also never thought I'd see the day where 'lucky' was the word used to describe me."

Cameron giggled lightly, and they paused for a moment.

"Allison, I'm going to kiss you, okay?" Thirteen whispered.

"Be my guest."

Thirteen lifted her head off the pillow, tilted it, and cupped Cameron's cheek with her hand as she pressed a soft kiss to the blonde's lips. Cameron kissed back, completely struck by how _intoxicating_ Thirteen was. Cameron felt her heart start to race, and she felt like a little kid again in the best way possible. Thirteen started to pull away, but Cameron stopped her by reaching up and engaging her in another light kiss. Thirteen furrowed her eyebrows out of surprise-Cameron was being extremely gentle and light, yet the kiss carried so much passion. They released one another, and Thirteen fell back onto her pillow. Cameron moved to her, resting her head on Thirteen's shoulder, and draping her arm across the brunette's stomach. Thirteen wrapped her free arm across Cameron's back, and soaked in all her warmth.

* * *

"Allison, I'm back!" Thirteen walked into the condo the next afternoon with grocery bags hanging from both her arms. She walked into the spacious kitchen and set the bags on the counter, immediately rubbing her sore arms to relieve some of the pressure. Cameron came padding into the kitchen, Thirteen lighting up as she did.

"Hey, I didn't know if you wanted-" she was cut off by Cameron's lips crashing into her own, forceful at first touch but soon the kiss went to the same softness they'd shared the night before. Thirteen's heart pounded-this was possibly the greatest greeting she'd ever received. Cameron pulled away, a shy expression forming on her face as Thirteen felt her own cheeks grow warm.

"I missed you too." Thirteen laughed and Cameron's smile grew wider,

"Sorry, it's just that Chase called and he was asking questions and I needed to forget about him for a minute."

"Well don't ever apologize for kissing me like that."

Cameron giggled a little,

"Okay. Hey, I made my appointment for the day after tomorrow at one."

Cameron was due for an exam, and she wanted Thirteen to be there.

"Great. Are you nervous?"

The blonde took a minute to consider the question,

"Not really. I have to admit, I'm getting a little antsy sitting around all day, and I miss the ER, so really the only thing I'm nervous about is not getting cleared to go back to work soon."

Thirteen had to agree with her, while spending all day lounging around with Cameron was great, she needed to be kept busy.

"Yeah, even though House is a pain in the ass, I love my job and I miss the hospital."

Cameron nodded,

"Exactly. I'm glad I'm not the only one."

Thirteen smiled at her,

"Let's put away these groceries, shall we?"


	8. Love is Learning

**A/N: Two updates in...well, less than 24 hours...yay!(?)**

**Disclaimer: I should really stop putting this because I think you all get the point and I'm running out of snarky comments to make.**

* * *

_"__Life has many ways of testing a person's will, either by having nothing happen at all or by having everything happen all at once."_

_-Paulo Coelho_

* * *

"Alright Dr. Cameron, everything looks good. Your ribs are setting nicely, that hand should be healed in no time, and your burns responded well to the course of antibiotics. They were only second degree so I wasn't too worried, does it feel better having those blisters all healed?"

Cameron nodded,

"The only thing that really bothers me is the heat from the burns, but I usually put an ice pack or a cool washcloth over them and it helps a lot."

The physician nodded, scribbling something on his clipboard,

"I want you to take another week off, but then you can go back to work whenever you're ready." He then smiled at Thirteen, "You're lucky to have such a great friend."

Thirteen blushed a little and smiled,

"Well I try my best."

* * *

"Hey, do you want to go to the winter fair tomorrow?" Cameron asked in the car as they drove home.

Thirteen-who was driving-let out a laugh and looked over at her momentarily,

"Really? Do you want to?"

Cameron blushed,

"Well, yeah. I think it would be fun, don't you?"

Thirteen smiled at the blonde's sweet and innocent nature,

"Of course, I'm just surprised to hear that coming from you."

"I told you there are lots of things you don't know about me."

Thirteen remembered the line, and knew that the blonde was wearing the same devilish expression that Thirteen herself had when Cameron first said the words to her.

* * *

"Let's go on the ferris wheel first!" Cameron exclaimed as they walked onto the fairgrounds.

A food stand caught Thirteen's eye,

"How about we get some hot chocolate to go first?" She barely managed to get the words out as her teeth chattered and her body shook.

Cameron looked at the taller woman,

"Here, take my hat." She slipped the grey beanie off and tugged into Thirteen's head.

"Thanks, but seriously, can we go get something hot and sweet to drink?" Thirteen adjusted the hat slightly,

"Awesome."

They each got a hot chocolate and headed for the ferris wheel. Thirteen was uncharacteristically quiet as they slid into one of the carriers, and Cameron studied her expression,

"Remy, what's wrong?"

Thirteen sighed,

"My dad used to take us to the fair all the time…I haven't been since before my mom died."

Cameron immediately felt guilty,

"Remy, I'm so sorry, I didn't know…"

"Don't be sorry, it's fine. Actually, it's bringing back some nice memories of my siblings, so it's okay."

Cameron raised her eyebrows,

"Siblings?"

Thirteen smiled,

"Yeah, an older brother and a younger sister-Carson and Anne."

"What are they like?"

"Anne is the perfect child. She's two years younger than me, married, a lawyer-and a damn good one with clients lining up-and pregnant with her first child. She lacks the Huntington's gene so she'll be the legacy of our family. My brother Carson started getting sick a few years ago, but he's a great guy. He's a fireman, has a gorgeous girlfriend that'll stick by him forever, and was easily the best big brother anyone could ask for. He stepped in a lot when my dad started having an affair while our mom was dying, and after our mom died and my dad came back to us he kept us strong." Thirteen described her siblings fondly, and Cameron could tell she loved them a lot.

"They sound wonderful, Remy."

The brunette smiled, then looked in Cameron's eyes,

"What about you? Do you have any siblings?"

Cameron slid onto the seat next to Thirteen, knowing that the brunette needed close contact.

"I have a brother who's three years older than me. His name is James, and he works for our family's insurance company. He's been married for the past four years, and his life is so normal it scares me. He's the kind of person that does the same thing everyday and is happy with it-and that's great, but I could never do it."

Thirteen nodded in agreement,

"I'm with you, I don't get how some people can live according to a schedule that they follow every day for forty years."

Cameron took Thirteen's hand,

"Lucky us, our lives are so unpredictable the average person would be scared."

Thirteen leaned closer to her,

"Average is scary."

They leaned into a short kiss, Thirteen letting out a small, content sigh afterwards. The wheel came to a stop at the bottom and they were instructed to get off.

"Okay, let's go play some games, get lunch, and then see a show. Oh, do you want to stay for fireworks tonight?" Thirteen babbled to Cameron, causing the blonde to chuckle,

"Of course I do, and that all sounds great."

* * *

Thirteen took Cameron's hand as they walked out of the small outdoor arena that the show had been in. She glanced at her silver watch,

"Hey, there's still half an hour until the fireworks, want to get dinner now or wait until we get home?"

Cameron ignored the pain in her stomach, she knew that ordering pizza from her favorite place when they got home would be worth the wait,

"I think we need to have a rematch at that basketball stand."

Thirteen laughed,

"Are you sure? I have twelve years of playing on a team under my belt."

Cameron nodded,

"I'm sure, besides even if you kick my ass again, I'm sure I'll find some way to get back at you."

Thirteen admired Cameron's fiery side, it was surprising and added to the blonde's complex personality.

* * *

Of course, Thirteen won-31 to 14-but Cameron knew her odds of beating the brunette were pretty slim. They walked around the grounds with their hands interlaced, until Thirteen stopped,

"Allison, may I say something?"

Cameron studied her for a brief moment before nodding.

"You are the most interesting, beautiful, and intelligent person I've ever been in love with."

Cameron was shocked,

"Are you sure you aren't talking about yourself?"

Thirteen blushed and stood close to the blonde, their faces centimeters apart,

"Definitely not."

She took Cameron into a deep kiss, and without warning the first of the fireworks burst into the sky. They smiled at how cliché the moment was, before reconnecting. Thirteen felt eyes on them, but she didn't care. The only thing that mattered was the beautiful woman she was falling for right in front of her, and for the first time in nearly twenty years, she felt like all was as it should be.


	9. You're Scaring Me (part 1)

**A/N: So this is basically the first half of a chapter, I just decided not to publish everything together because the chapter would be about 4,000 words long...which is crazy. So please know that this chapter and the one following it are all the same day, and that the next chapter is a continuation of this one. Also a legitimate disclaimer-I am not a medical professional in any way whatsoever, these next couple chapters follow an actual episode of "House" very closely, and I've taken a lot of the dialogue from the episode (of course I've added in everything else, it's just that this is similar to what I did in chapter one.**

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Fox.**

* * *

_"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss in life is what dies inside us while we are still alive."_

_-Tupac Shakur_

* * *

"I so hope the ER hasn't turned into a disaster zone." Cameron knew that "anxious" wasn't nearly a strong enough word to describe how she felt about going back to work that day.

"Allison, are you sure you don't want me to drive? Your hands are going to start shaking any minute, and that wrist still makes me nervous."

Cameron ignored Thirteen's comment,

"Oh hush, we're almost there anyways. What did House say when you talked to him?"

"Well I was assigned clinic duty for the day, so you could say he's mad, but he'll get over it."

Cameron smiled as they pulled up to the hospital, and sighed,

"Ready?"

Thirteen took everything in, then looked over at the blonde,

"Ready."

They walked up the main path to the front entrance with their arms hooked, and they were just about to walk in when Cameron stopped them,

"Wait a minute-do we tell people? About…us?"

Thirteen realized they hadn't discussed the matter, and being the private person she was, she wanted to keep the information between them for as long as possible.

"Well House will find out pretty quickly, and once he does he'll tell everyone. If it's okay with you, I'd rather we just let things happen in their own-or in this case, House's-time."

Cameron thought about it, and finally agreed,

"Okay, that sounds good."

They exchanged smiles and Thirteen started to walk in, but Cameron stopped her again, pulling her into a kiss as she did. Thirteen smiled through the kiss as sparks tingled her lips, and felt them continue to do so after they released one another. The pair walked in with the biggest, dumbest smiles on their faces-and didn't care one bit.

"Have fun." Thirteen called to Cameron as they parted, her heart fluttering when the blonde turned back and smiled at her.

* * *

"Hey, glad to see you back!" Foreman approached Thirteen as she rushed through mountains of forms in the clinic-which was as busy as she'd ever seen it.

"It's good to be back, although I must say coming back an overly full clinic isn't all it's cut out to be."

Foreman chuckled,

"Yeah, I bet. Anyways sorry to bother you but I just wanted to say hi, and there's this Huntington's drug trial that I think you might be interested in."

Okay, that was crossing the line-and Thirteen wouldn't allow it.

"Allison is doing great, thanks for asking. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a clinic full of patients."

"Thirteen!" Foreman called after her as she sped into the clinic lobby, but she ignored him entirely.

She stepped into the small waiting room, and nearly laughed as she saw what a joke it was to try and fit this many people in this small of a space.

"Okay, I need a Mr.-"

She stopped when she felt something hard press into the center of her back, and out of the corner of her eye a man stood right next to her.

"I've got a gun pressed to the back of your chest, don't make any sudden moves."

She slowly turned her head to face him, her eyes widening and her heart racing,

"What do you want?"

The man, who looked to be slightly older than House, turned his gaze to the patients in front of them,

"I want to take you, along with that nurse and some of these patients to the dean's office, where Dr. House is currently located."

She nodded,

"Everybody listen up! Nurse, and uh-you all, please come with me and this nice man to the dean's office." She gestured to the group of people closest to her, but no one moved. The man then moved his gun from Thirteen's back, and pointed it at the crowd,

"Do what she says."

The random six faces and the nurse Thirteen had picked stood up and rushed to stand next to her.

"All of you walk in front of me, be very calm and I won't shoot."

Thirteen put herself at the front of the group so she was out of the man's sight. She reached for her pager, and pressed the button for a code silver. They burst into Cuddy's office, where House was messing around with the desk. He saw Thirteen and gave her an unamused look,

"If this is some sort of sick game-"

"Shut up!" The man shouted and pointed his gun at House, "I'm sick, and I need you to tell me why."

House froze for a moment, and slowly backed away from the desk,

"What seems to be the problem here?"

* * *

"So why exactly is Cuddy paging all of us away from our departments to have us meet in House's office?" Chase asked Cameron as they made their way up to the second floor.

"Something involving the code, I think."

"Damn. What are the odds that on your first day back a gunman walks in here?"

Cameron ignored Chase's question-she just wanted to know what was going on.

They walked into House's spacious office to find Foreman, Taub, Kutner, and Cuddy already there. They all looked uneasy and anxious.

"Lisa, what's going on?" Cameron slowly asked Cuddy.

"Just a few minutes ago, a gunman walked into the clinic demanding to see me, really he just wanted to go to my office because House is in there. The man is claiming that he's sick and needs House for a diagnosis. He took six patients, a nurse, House, and Thirteen hostage."

Cameron's heart skipped a beat,

"Hold on, Thirteen was taken?"

Cuddy nodded.

"He apparently went up to her first and threatened to kill her if she wouldn't help him."

Cameron felt sick, and she didn't hear the rest of what Cuddy had to say.

"I need to go down to security, and you all need to stay here and help House." Cuddy looked at each of them, noticing how pale Cameron had turned, and knew that it was best if she didn't ask any questions. With that, she left them.

"Okay guys, let's call House." Taub looked at the rest of the doctors in the room, "Cameron, are you alright?"

Cameron snapped at the sound of her name,

"Uh…yeah. Let's uh, let's help House and Thirteen. The sooner we solve this the better."

* * *

Thirteen's heart stopped as everyone stared at her when one of the patients suggested House administer whatever was in the syringe to her.

"She's sick, _you_ are a very large creep. Take off your shirt."

'_Thank you House.'_

Thirteen's prediction was right-House had gotten a sedative. It seemed as though everything happened at once-first the patient who'd received the sedative fell to the floor, and the next the man standing next to him received a gunshot to the leg. They all froze as adrenaline pumped through their systems, and nearly jumped when the phone rang.

"It's for you." House said to their captor, barely blinking at the events that had just occurred.

The man went and sat next to the phone, and Thirteen rushed to help the patient who'd just taken a bullet. She sat him on the couch and elevated his wounded leg on the coffee table, taking his jacket and tying it around his leg.

"You need to keep this pressure here, and don't move."

The patient looked at her like she was crazy, but she ignored him and turned her attention back to House as the phone continued to ring. It finally stopped, and then House's cell rang,

"Joe's bar and grill."

Thirteen heard what sounded like Foreman's voice on the other side, and with that, House set the phone on speaker and placed it on the desk next to him.

"What causes low lung volume, heart palpitations, fatigue, stomach pain, insomnia and a rash?" He asked.

"This is pathetic. If I stuck a bomb to my chest do I get seven doctors attending to me?" Thirteen heard Chase's unamused voice come through.

"Dr. Robert Chase." House clarified, gesturing to the cell phone as he did.

Chase argued with House, and Thirteen knew he was walking out.

_'__Damn it.'_

"Seriously? You're walking out?" House asked his former employee.

"No, he's just kidding, he's right here." Cameron tried to lie, but no one was buying it.

House had one of the patients-who appeared to be a kid around sixteen or seventeen-toss him a marker, and started writing ideas.

"Chest pain, the lung problems, fatigue, rash-sounds like a chronic lung infection." Foreman suggested.

"Heart palpitations and fatigue could be a cancer that spread from the lungs." Thirteen figured she'd contribute in hopes it would help ease her mind.

"Next!" Cameron heard House's voice call as relief surged through her body at the sound of Thirteen's voice.

"If his diaphragm's not working, maybe it could be his nerves are freezing up." The blonde piped in.

House muttered something to the nurse, who was worried about the patient that had received the sedative.

"Next!"

"Shortest distance between insomnia and bad pain is poor circulation. With struggled breathing, it could be a heart defect." Kutner ignored the terrified expression Cameron had just shot him.

House paused for a moment, looking at the list he'd just made.

"We're gonna get some special deliveries-Foreman! You're gonna draw blood, test for infection and cancer. Cameron, comb through his medical records, see if anything in his past 900 medications could have screwed his heart up. Taub, Kutner, check his apartment for neurotoxins."

"873 North Brunswick street-back window's unlocked." Their captor interrupted House, causing an array of expressions to arise.

"Giving us your address, means you have no intention of going back…means you do have an endgame." House stared him in the eye, and Thirteen wondered if he knew what the possible endgame was.

* * *

Cameron sighed as she sat down in the diagnostics conference room with what was probably the thickest patient file she'd ever held.

"Okay Jason, let's see how fucked up these meds have made you."

Foreman raised his eyebrows at her language-she realized she'd never really sworn in front of anyone, especially Foreman.

"Sorry, just…stressed."

He caught her eyes, and tried his best to muster up any compassion he had,

"Look, I'm worried too, but honestly, if there's any one of us that can handle this situation, it's House."

She frowned, and he realized that House wasn't the issue,

"But, House isn't the one that you're worried about."

She shot him a guilty expression,

"She just…already has to deal with so much shit, I want nothing more than for her to be as healthy and happy as possible for the time she has left."

"You love her." Foreman concluded. Cameron responded with nothing but a nod.

"Judging by the way she talks about you and her behavior around you, she loves you too, and you two have spent the last few weeks discovering your feelings for each other, and now losing one another is the end of the world."

Cameron nodded yet again.

"If everything goes well, there's this Huntington's drug trial I'd like to get her a seat for, and I think she'd listen to you."

Cameron looked at him,

"Okay, I'll talk to her about it."

"Thanks."


	10. Facing Fear (part 2)

**A/N: So yeah pretty much a continuation of the last chapter. Enjoy!**

* * *

_"Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength."_

_-Unknown_

* * *

Thirteen cried out and fell to the floor as pain surged through her body. She felt incredibly stupid-here she was with a neurodegenerative disease, taking a drug that caused nerve and muscle damage for a hostage. The nurse came over to her, rubbing her back.

They got a call, and House picked up, immediately putting it on speaker.

"It's not infection." Foreman's voice came through.

House stood up and crossed the option off the list,

"So either his heart's on the frets, or he's got cancer."

"We found a picture of his mom, she's got a droopy eye, fat face, thick neck." Kutner added.

"Classic signs of an upper lobe tumor." Cameron commented.

"Or she's just ugly." House snapped.

"They're also classic signs of an adrenal problem." Kutner subliminally fought Cameron.

Thirteen couldn't take it,

"It's his heart." Her voice was weak, which she knew would set Cameron off.

Everyone turned to her.

"You can't be sure-"

"His neck, descended jugular." Thirteen cut off House, her eyes trained on Jason.

House limped over to Jason and placed his fingers on Jason's neck.

"What are you doing?" Jason asked angrily.

"I'm going to try to strangle you faster than you can pull the trigger."

"He needs to check your pulse." Thirteen assured Jason.

"It's racing." House replied.

"We need to get paddles." She retorted.

"Or maybe we could just do nothing." One of the patients commented.

'I'm getting weaker, if they don't fix it, I'll shoot you." Jason snapped back to the patient.

"Don't! He didn't mean-"

"Shut up! All of you." House interrupted the patient's wife. He placed a hand on Jason's carotid artery, ignoring his protests.

"Carotid massage, it'll slow your heart." His expression grew frustrated and Thirteen knew it wasn't working.

"He's too angry."

"Get the paddles!" Jason shouted at him.

"Uh-uh, those things will contract your muscles, and that doesn't discriminate against trigger fingers."

Thirteen closed her eyes as they argued, she needed to think.

"We can cardiovert chemically." She spat out.

"If we don't know what kind of rhythm it is we can't-"

"If we don't do something he's gonna shoot one of us, I'm gonna go get the drugs-"

"No one goes anywhere." Jason cut Thirteen off and held his gun inches away from her chest.

They all froze, and House decided he needed to save her ass again,

"If she doesn't come back, there's plenty of other people you can shoot."

Jason took the kid, and turned back to Thirteen,

"Alright, thirty seconds."

Thirteen ran out of the office as fast as she could, making her way to the medications cart. She punched in her code and grabbed the syringes that had heart-slowing injections. She was just about to run back when a SWAT agent caught her eye, and motioned for her to come to them. She looked back at the office, and shook her head. He tried again to get her to go, but she couldn't do it-she needed to go back.

* * *

Cameron couldn't take it, she stepped into the hallway and tried to catch her breath as tears threatened to make their way down her face.

"Cameron, what's wrong?" Taub followed her into the hallway.

"Why is Thirteen being such an idiot? She's going to die!"

Taub was taken aback by how much she cared,

"Cameron, she's going to be okay-House won't let anything happen to her, okay? Come back in, we need your help."

* * *

Cameron jumped as the phone rang yet again, and she was shaking as she picked it up.

"The detheamexazone is making Thirteen's kidneys shut down, but not the patient's, why?"

Cameron felt tears make their way down her cheeks and she furrowed her brows out of anger and confusion,

"This guy's been on fifty different medications his kidneys should be failing but something's protecting them." Her words were rushed out of an attempt to hide her feelings.

"I need to slap you, for diagnostic purposes." They heard House call to Jason, and Cameron winced as she heard Thirteen let out a small whimper of pain.

"Seriously, if I was jerking you around I'd say I need to kick you in the groin."

There was a moment of silence before they heard a loud _'smack!'_ ring out.

"He has calcium deficiency, drugs that block calcium are healing him against kidney damage."

Cameron blurted out the first relevant fact that came to her mind,

"He's been on protein prohibiters for years for stomach pain."

"They've been protecting his kidneys for years." House replied. "Something, that has a long incubation period, something that explains his kidneys, something that explains his breathing problems, heart problems, jumpy nerves and weak blood"

"Leishmaniasis." Taub responded.

_'__No, that's not it.' _Cameron thought to herself.

"Meliodosis, it gets through the lungs, spread to the heart, it explains everything."

"Except that if you read the patient history you'd know that he's never been to a tropical climate." House tried to argue with her.

"Is he absolutely sure of that? Mexico, Costa Rica, you've never been to-"

"I've never been anywhere south of Florida." Jason called to her.

Everyone froze, and Cameron knew House would be appalled.

"You idiot." House snarked.

"Florida counts?" Jason asked genuinely.

It took all Cameron had to not laugh at how stupid the situation was, and she wished she could be in the same room as them to smack him.

Taub hung up,

"Thank god that's over."

But it wasn't-they all knew that.

"Unless he kills Thirteen or House-or both of them." Cameron commented, and they all looked at her, hoping that she wouldn't be right.

* * *

Thirteen groaned out of boredom as she watched the dialysis machine, she wanted nothing more than for Cameron to be there. She was still in shock about the day's events, but she was too tired to really do anything about it. Suddenly, she heard the door open, and she turned her head to see Cameron standing there.

"Allison-"

"Shh." Cameron cut her off, "I need to look at you." She slowly walked towards Thirteen's bed, tears filling her eyes as she watched the brunette. She sat down and took Thirteen's hand,

"Do you have _any_ idea how scared out of my mind I was?"

Thirteen gulped,

"I have a pretty good idea."

Cameron couldn't help but smile at Thirteen's comment-she was right. Thirteen laughed at herself, and Cameron crawled all the way onto the bed so she was laying next to the brunette,

"I'm being serious, I was scared out of my wits. I cried in front of _Taub_."

Thirteen thought about how awkward he must have been in the situation, and a rush of chills went through her body as Cameron reached across her and started to stroke her hair.

"Remy, I think you should do the drug trial Foreman suggested."

Thirteen studied her,

"Are you sure?"

Cameron nodded,

"It could be good, who knows."

They were silent, and Thirteen wanted nothing more than to spend the whole night just looking in her…girlfriend? Was Cameron her girlfriend.

Cameron noticed Thirteen's expression change,

"What are you thinking about?"

Thirteen paused,

"Would you say you're my girlfriend?"

Cameron widened her eyes a little,

"I mean, I don't know what else to call it, so…yes, definitely."

Thirteen smiled, and leaned in for a kiss. Cameron closed the gap, taking in Thirteen's scent and sweet taste.

'_This is how it should be.'_


	11. Distractions

**A/N: Hey all! I am so so sorry it's taken me so long to write this last update, it's just that I'm back at university and I've been getting back into the swing of everything, so working time for writing back into my schedule has been tough. Luckily, I'm getting back into all my stories. Please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: You know the drill**

* * *

_"__It doesn't matter how tough we are. Trauma always leaves a scar. It follows us home, changes our lives. Trauma messes everybody up. But, maybe that's the point."_

_-Alex Karev, "Grey's Anatomy"_

* * *

"Remy? What's wrong?" Cameron looked over at her girlfriend as Thirteen froze in front of the entrance to the hospital.

"I uh…just, need a moment." Thirteen had spent four days in the hospital, and then proceeded to only take one of her ten given days off-despite advice from everyone to take at least a week.

"We can go back home, if you want." Cameron suggested, "You just came home from the hospital, and-"

"Allison, I'm ready." Thirteen looked the blonde hard in the eyes, "I _want_ to be here I just…needed a minute. Let's go."

Cameron nodded and started to walk through the door, and Thirteen had to rush to catch up to the blonde. As they walked through the entrance Thirteen pressed a small kiss to Cameron's lips, her mood lightening once she felt Cameron smile into the kiss.

"Good luck." Cameron whispered as they parted ways.

_'__Please let her be okay.'_

* * *

Cameron went the whole morning without a single word from House or anyone on his team-and while this was usually a blessing, today she'd expected (and wanted) some sort of update on how Thirteen was coping.

Just as she'd settled into her office and was about to bite into the sandwich she'd brought for lunch, House came striding in.

"If you carry your nose any higher in the air you won't be able to see where you're going."

He ignored her comment,

"Rumor has it daddy's little co-dependent is sleeping with daddy's little lesbian."

Cameron rolled her eyes,

"We aren't sleeping together and she isn't a lesbian."

'_We aren't sleeping together…yet.'_ She thought to herself.

"But you are." House retorted.

She looked at him so his hard blue eyes were level with her own,

"I'm not sure, and it really doesn't matter. How is she?"

House knew he was about to comment about her projecting or avoiding the elephant in the room, so he figured he might as well tell her what she needed to know,

"A nervous wreck. Nearly had a panic attack when I asked her to go run an MRI on our patient."

Cameron felt concern tug at her heart,

"Can she come work down here? At least…until she can handle being upstairs again? She'll be busy all the time and I think it would be good and it'll take her mind off everything-"

"You know I'm not just interested in your sex life, part of the reason why I came down here was to bug you into letting her work the rest of the week in the ER, but obviously I don't have to do that seeing as you two have quite the gay-finity for one another." House cut her off and she raised her eyebrows at him-he was good.

"By the way I don't blame you-women are hot as hell. Then again, women like you and Thirteen attract anything that moves."

Cameron blushed at the comment-not because of her, but because the statement was beyond accurate for Thirteen.

"Send her down." The blonde called after him as she noticed him get up and start to leave.

* * *

Thirteen was elated when House told her she was allowed to work the ER for the rest of the week-not only did she get to spend time with Cameron, but hopefully the rush of the ER would help take her mind off everything.

_'__Two kinds of distractions-perfect.'_

"Remy!" Thirteen perked up at the familiar voice calling her. She saw Cameron standing in the doorway of her office, waving the brunette over. She made her way over to her girlfriend, and planted a light kiss on the blonde's soft cheek once they reached each other. Cameron smiled at her, resisting the urge to kiss her right then and there,

"Alright, you know the drill."

Thirteen nodded,

"Foreman wants to meet with me this afternoon so we can set up everything for the drug trial, but until then I'm all yours."

Cameron saw a flash of mischief surge through the brunette's eyes, and she felt herself flush at the subtext.

"Let's get to work."

* * *

Cameron nearly jumped out of her seat as Thirteen burst into her office and slid onto her desk.

"Ready to go?" The younger woman asked excitedly.

Cameron smiled at her girlfriend's energy,

"Just about, yeah. How was the meeting with Foreman?"

"Good. We set up my schedule, went over all the legal stuff, talked about the effects of the drug."

Cameron nodded,

"How often is Foreman going to steal my girlfriend away from me and her boss?"

Thirteen chuckled,

"Only four days a week, for a few hours at a time."

Cameron signed off on her last chart, then looked back up at the brunette,

"Thank goodness."

She rose to meet Thirteen's level, and leaned into her, pressing a kiss to her lips. They held the kiss for a moment, before Thirteen separated her lips, initiating another kiss that was deeper and longer.

Cameron heard footsteps making their way to her office, and she heard an Australian accent start to say her name.

"Hey, Cam-" Chase stopped as Thirteen and Cameron broke apart, not quite knowing what to say next.

"Uh, sorry Chase, what's up?" Cameron tried her best to act natural, despite the fact that she knew Chase saw what had been going on.

"I was just going to ask if you two wanted to grab a drink…I invited Foreman too. But uh, I can see you're both…busy." He blushed and turned around to leave.

"Chase wait!" Thirteen called after him. She got off Cameron's desk and followed him.

"You could have told me, you know." Chase turned to face the brunette.

She felt guilty-he was right. It wasn't fair because he was her friend, and everyone else in their inner circle knew.

"I know, I'm sorry. We just wanted to keep it quiet, even though Taub and Foreman found out last week and House has probably known I've had feelings for Cameron for awhile. I don't know why we didn't tell you, and I really am sorry."

A half smile crossed the tall man's face,

"If you want, we can all talk about it at lunch tomorrow."

Thirteen nodded,

"I'll talk to Allison, but that sounds great."

Chase's expression lightened, and he placed a hand on her shoulder, giving it a light squeeze,

"Take care of her-I already know she'll take good care of you."

She smiled at him,

"I will. Promise."

* * *

Thirteen couldn't stop laughing as she and Cameron walked through the doors of the blonde's condo,

"I mean, did you see his _face_? It was like, 'do I join or do I just walk away?'"

Cameron laughed and playfully shoved the brunette,

"Remy! That's so gross!"

"Come on you know I'm right." Thirteen asked as she set her purse down on the little table next to the door.

Cameron looked off to the side, pretending to come up with an answer-even though she fully agreed with her girlfriend,

"Yeah, I guess."

The two chuckled and stepped into the living room. Thirteen collapsed on the couch, pulling the blonde down with her. Cameron squealed as she landed half on top of Thirteen, her pulse racing as she felt the brunette wrap an arm around her-careful of the blonde's still sore body. They were silent for a moment, until Cameron leaned in for another deep kiss, wanting to continue what they'd started in her office. The blonde opened her mouth a little, willing for Thirteen to do the same.

"Allison…" Thirteen said between kisses.

"Ssh, keep going, if you want." Cameron responded.

She felt Thirteen nod, and she felt her heart race as Thirteen shifted slightly, placing both her hands on Cameron's hips. Cameron reached up to place her hands on Thirteen's waist-right below the brunette's breasts. Thirteen slid her tongue into the blonde's mouth, and was pleasantly surprised when her girlfriend did the same.

Thirteen couldn't believe how comfortable Cameron was-it was like the blonde was making out with her high school sweetheart. Thirteen felt a twist in her stomach, and she knew that she needed to stop.

"Allison, let's stop."

Cameron pulled away, smiling, and Thirteen slid off the blonde..

"That was great Remy."

Thirteen looked over at her,

"I was concerned you were uncomfortable…and then I got…well, let's just say if we didn't stop I think we'd both make regretful decisions."

Cameron nodded,

"I do want to take things slow, that's for sure. Especially since I've never actually done it with a girl."

Thirteen smiled at her girlfriend's sweet innocence,

"I'll teach you, when you're ready."


	12. Recovery

**A/N: I told y'all I was getting better at fitting writing into my schedule. Enjoy chickadees :) PS- the title of this chapter may be confusing, but this chapter really is just to slow down and let these guys (and you all(sorry about how cruel I am by the way)) heal, because I think we could all use a bit of calm in this story before anything else happens.**

**Disclaimer: Sadly, it's still a no.**

* * *

_"When love awakens in our heart then selfless service is attained"_

_-Radhanath Swami_

* * *

"Remy! Are you ready to go?" Cameron called for her girlfriend as she walked into the locker room.

"Yeah, one second!"

Cameron rounded the corner to find Thirteen tugging a black v-neck sweater over her long, thin torso. Cameron eyed her for a moment before glancing at her watch again,

"Cuddy is going to be waiting for us, and I bet traffic is pretty bad right now-"

She was cut off by the brunette's lips making their way to her own. Thirteen released the small blonde and smiled at her,

"It's fine. Cuddy doesn't live very far from here, we'll be on time."

It had been two weeks since Thirteen went back to House's team, and aside from some nightmares and anxiety over going into the MRI lab, she'd been recovering fairly well. Cameron was healing well herself-her burns were finally healed and her bones were setting nicely, and she was no longer in constant physical pain.

Cuddy had invited the pair over to her house in order to ask Cameron a question and to let the pair meet the baby girl that Cuddy was in the process of adopting. Cameron nearly jumped as Thirteen slammed her locker shut, grabbed her purse, and took the blonde's hand.

"Shall we?" The taller woman asked.

"We shall."

* * *

"She's adorable." Thirteen commented as she smiled down on the tiny baby who was falling asleep in her crib.

"Yeah, she's a great baby." Cuddy replied as she looked on from the rocking chair.

"Her name's Rachel, right?" Cameron asked softly, looking over at their boss as she did.

Cuddy nodded and smiled lightly. They spent another moment in comfortable silence until the ringing of the doorbell interrupted their thoughts.

"I'll be right back." Cuddy stood and rushed past them to get the door.

Cameron turned her gaze from Rachel to Thirteen, who seemed lost in her own world as she watched Rachel.

"What are you thinking about?" Cameron asked her, pushing some of the brunette's hair behind her ear as she did.

Thirteen felt chills and then a sense of warmth shoot through her body at the blonde's touch, then met Cameron's eyes and smiled,

"I don't know, just…my whole life-like most little girls-I thought I'd grow up, get married, and have kids. But once I realized I might have Huntington's, I started to give up on that dream, and now that I have my diagnosis…I don't want to risk putting a child through the same thing I went through."

Cameron felt tears sting her eyes as her girlfriend's words broke her heart. She herself knew she wanted kids, but it was inappropriate to be having that discussion so early in their relationship.

"You don't have to give up, I mean-"

"Who would want to settle down with me?" Thirteen nearly snapped.

Cameron swallowed the lump that had been forming in her throat,

"Me."

Thirteen felt all the tension that was in her chest release, and she pulled Cameron into her embrace, kissing the blonde's cheek on the way into the hug. They released one another as they heard Cuddy's footsteps start to make their way back up the stairs and into the nursery.

"Sorry about that." The older brunette said to them as she walked in.

She went to the other side of the crib so that she was across from her two employees, and she turned her attention to Cameron,

"Cameron, how would you like my job? At least, until I get back to work."

Cameron froze-did Cuddy really just offer her job up temporarily?

"Um…I…" She turned to Thirteen for help, and when the brunette nodded, she looked back at Cuddy, "Yes, that sounds great."

Cuddy nodded,

"Great. You'll start Monday."

That gave Cameron the weekend to mentally prepare herself for the weeks of supervising House that were ahead of her.

'_Babysitting House. Yay._

* * *

"So how's supervising the ultimate pain in the ass going?" Thirteen walked into Cuddy's office where Cameron was sitting on the couch flipping through files.

"Let's just say I'm remembering why I quit in the first place."

Thirteen smirked,

"Sorry about that."

Cameron looked up at her,

"Hey, it's great to see you, but the look on your face is telling me that you have something to say."

Thirteen nodded,

"Foreman's been acting…weird. I think it may have to do with the trial. Has he said anything to you?"

Cameron furrowed her eyebrows,

"No, but I can ask him if you want."

Thirteen shook her head,

"It's okay, I guess I should just let him be."

Cameron gave her a half smile, and they let the short conversation end with comfortable silence. Thirteen suddenly felt her pager buzz,

"It's House. Sorry, I have to go."

Cameron sighed, wishing they could just have one more minute to relax. Thirteen bent down, supporting herself with a hand on the couch and pressed a quick kiss to Cameron's lips.

"See you soon."

* * *

Thirteen collapsed onto her couch out of exhaustion that evening. She glanced at her watch-Cameron would be over any minute. She so badly wanted to pour herself a drink of some sort of cheap soda mixed with her favorite vodka, but she knew that it would break Cameron's heart and would kill the mood for their evening.

_'__We'll probably have wine with dinner anyways.'_

The doorbell sounded as she finished a yawn,

"It's open, Cam!"

The blonde's smiley face appeared in the doorway and Thirteen stood to greet her girlfriend.

"How was Cuddy's?" Thirteen asked as she took Cameron into her embrace.

"Well…I quit." Cameron barely managed to get the words out as Thirteen's lips met her cheek.

Thirteen looked at her, confused,

"What? Why?"

Cameron sighed,

"It was great, working with all of you-really. I just can't put up with House's games. I let him do things I normally wouldn't, which is fine when it's him, but I don't want to bring that into other parts of my life."

Thirteen furrowed her eyebrows,

"Like…us?"

"How'd you know?" Cameron smiled slightly, causing Thirteen to chuckle.

"Aw Allison, don't worry. You and I are going to be just fine."

Cameron cupped the brunette's cheek and pressed a soft kiss to her lips,

"I hope so."

They smiled at each other, until Cameron remembered what was probably bugging Thirteen,

"Oh yeah, how was Foreman this afternoon? Still acting squirreley?"

The brunette shook her head,

"No, it was weird…he seemed almost…relieved? I don't know, but whatever. I'm done trying to predict whatever he's up to."

Cameron shrugged,

"I gave up on that a long time ago."

The blonde acted like she didn't care what their coworker was doing, but in reality she was concerned.

_'__He better not fuck with my girlfriend.'_


	13. Hardships

**A/N: Here's the next chapter (lucky number thirteen ;D). Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Never have, never will**

* * *

_"Your best teacher is your last mistake."_

_-Unknown_

* * *

Thirteen winced as pain surged through her head when the morning light hit her eyes. She glanced at the time on her phone-just five minutes before her alarm was set to go off. She rolled over away from the sunlight and closed her eyes yet again, but found herself disappointed when the pain in her head didn't stop. As soon as her alarm started to go off, the pain sharpened.

_'What the hell?'_

She pushed her questions about the pain to the back of her mind, and carried on with her morning routine.

* * *

"Morning gorgeous!" Cameron called to Thirteen as the brunette stepped into the hospital.

"Hey." Thirteen called softly as they reached each other.

"How has your morning been? Did you sleep well? I hope traffic wasn't too-"

"Cam, please." Thirteen cut off the blonde's excited questions.

The blonde simply looked at her, confused.

"I'm sorry, I'm just tired, I woke up with a really bad headache. I took ibuprofen-and yes, I ate-but it still hasn't gone away."

Cameron frowned,

"Where does it hurt? And what kind of pain?"

Thirteen paused,

"Front, and it's a sharp, dizzying pain."

"You should ask Foreman, because that doesn't really just sound like an average headache." Cameron knew that Thirteen probably wouldn't listen to her, but it was still worth the effort.

"Yeah. Thanks, I'll see you at lunch." Thirteen pressed a kiss to the blonde's forehead before disappearing into the elevator.

* * *

Cameron glanced at her phone again as she waited for Thirteen to step into the hospital cafe at any minute. It was seven minutes past the time they had agreed to have lunch together, and while Thirteen wasn't usually late, Cameron did suppose that House could be holding her up and not letting her text or call Cameron to inform the blonde of what was going on. Cameron sat in silence until she caught sight of Taub. She nearly ran to him, wondering what was going on with the rest of the team.

"Taub!" She called to him as she approached him.

"Hello." Taub dragged out.

"Do you know where Re-er, Thirteen is? I tried texting her, we were supposed to meet for lunch ten minutes ago, and she's not usually late, and-"

"Oh boy." Taub sighed, causing an uneasy feeling to settle in Cameron's stomach. "Foreman took her home, although I couldn't tell you why."

Cameron felt anger rush through her body, and she nearly knocked multiple people over as she darted out of the cafe and out to her car.

* * *

Cameron rarely sped, and here she was driving nearly twenty miles over the speed limit. Once she reached a red light, she picked up her cell and dialed Thirteen's home phone number.

_"Come on, pick up pick up."_ She whispered into the phone as she waited. When there was no answer, she felt her heart start to race. She didn't know what she was expecting, but she knew that there was a knot in her stomach telling her that something wasn't right. She pulled up to Thirteen's apartment building and headed inside, immediately making her way for the stairs. She reached the brunette's door and knocked, pressing her ear to the door for a moment,

"Remy? It's me, Allison."

"It's open." She heard her girlfriend's soft voice call out.

Cameron stepped into the spacious apartment, rounding the small glass divider and laying her eyes on Thirteen. Her gaze went to a cut on the brunette's leg, which was dripping blood.

"Remy, what's going on? What happened to your leg?"

Thirteen didn't even know where to start,

"I uh, went for the phone, assuming it was you or maybe House or Foreman…Allison, I can't see."

Cameron felt her heart sink,

"What? How? Remy please…" She took a seat next to her girlfriend on the couch and looked at her.

"Well…with the drug trial, I was on placebo, and then Foreman found out and switched me to the drug…I couldn't tell you why no matter how hard I tried. Anyways this is a side effect."

Cameron was past angry-she was _infuriated._

"Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell was he thinking?" She started to yell, causing Thirteen to flinch.

"Allison, please, he didn't know-"

"Remy that's bullshit, he of all people should know that this is not something you mess with. Anyways, we should get you to the hospital-you need an MRI and radiation."

Thirteen didn't know how to respond. She knew Cameron was right, but she also didn't want for anyone to suffer consequences.

"Remy? What are you thinking?"

Thirteen turned her head in the direction of Cameron's voice,

"He was just trying to help…I didn't think anything would actually happen."

Cameron felt bad because she could sense that Thirteen was truly upset,

"I know, still I don't understand why he's so reckless sometimes, especially for someone who cares about their career so much."

Thirteen nodded.

"Come on, I'll take good care of you." Cameron said, trying to ignore the pain in her heart as her girlfriend tried to look her in the eyes but just couldn't.

* * *

"You know the drill, hold still, I'm right here." Cameron spoke softly into the microphone, rubbing her temples out of stress as she did.

'_Where is Foreman? I need to rip his throat out.'_

"Allison?" Thirteen called out, bringing her back to that moment.

"Yeah sweetie?"

"I'm scared."

Cameron was taken aback-she'd seen Thirteen in immense physical pain, but never, _not once_ did the brunette admit to any sort of insecurity or fear-this was huge. Cameron had to be brave for Thirteen for the first time.

"I know. Don't worry, you're going to be okay-I swear."

Thirteen felt herself relax slightly, she trusted Cameron.

"Hope I'm interrupting something."

Cameron jumped at House's voice behind her.

"Shit! House what do you want-wait, do you know where Foreman is?"

House looked around,

"Well, he's definitely not right outside waiting around like a bump on a log."

Cameron nearly shoved House as she darted out of the MRI lab. She saw Foreman standing there, and she knew the second he caught sight of her that he saw what was coming.

"Foreman! What the fuck were you thinking? Do you _want_ to lose your medical license? What would cause you to do something so idiotic? Are you aware that Remy has a tumor sitting in her brain that's _blinding_ her? God, can't you just ignore your ego for once?! I swear to god if you pull a stunt like this again, I will make sure that someone aside from the victim suffers consequences!"

Cameron was fuming, and she had to stop before she did something that would get her in trouble. Foreman just stood there, taking everything she'd spat at him to heart.

"Well? Do you have anything to say?"

He met her gaze,

"I'm sorry, really. I didn't know this would happen. Cameron really, I just wanted to help."

Cameron knew he was genuine in his apology,

"I know. Still, I just don't understand why your judgment gets clouded by your pride sometimes…I've never understood that about you."

She sighed, and an awkward silence fell over them. Cameron felt uncomfortable, and she needed to see what House was doing.

"Foreman, please help House…she needs to be okay."

Foreman nodded,

"I will."

Cameron relaxed her expression and exhaled as he walked past her to go help House and Thirteen.

* * *

"It's been four hours, shouldn't there be _some_ difference by now?" Cameron's eyes darted back and forth between House and Foreman.

"I'm not sure, it could-"

"What the loon is trying to say, is that he doesn't know how this type of tumor will react to radiation." House cut Foreman off, knowing that Cameron needed the cold, hard, truth.

She took a deep, shaky breath,

"Alright. You guys go back to your case or whatever it is you should be doing, I'll stay with her."

With that, she slowly slid the glass door to Thirteen's hospital room open and quietly stepped in when she noticed that the brunette was fast asleep.

_'Poor thing is probably exhausted_.'

She sat down in a chair next to the bed and sat in silence for a good half hour before thoughts came flooding into her mind.

_'Why did this have to happen to her? Are there other patients who got tumors too? Why did Foreman switch her off the placebo in the first place? Did House see this coming? This is all my fault…I shouldn't have convinced her to do the trial in the first place.'_

She stopped herself, and pondered the last fact. Thirteen hadn't really wanted to participate in the first place, and she probably wouldn't have if Cameron hadn't pushed her. She felt tears sting her eyes, and she reached for Thirteen's hand.

"I'm so sorry." She whispered, giving her girlfriend's hand the lightest squeeze.

Thirteen stirred and opened her eyes,

"Allison?"

Cameron looked up at her,

"Hey, sorry I didn't mean to wake you I just…Remy? What's going on?"

She noticed that the brunette's eyes were widening, and her gaze was moving all around the room.

"I can see."


	14. Lockdown

**A/N: Here's the next chapter! It's based off the season six episode "Lockdown". Again, it's AU so I changed like everything it's just that some of the dialogue is the same...but overall it's still my work. So yeah,**

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Fox (sadly)**

* * *

_"Play every game as if it is your last one."_

_-Guy Lafleur_

* * *

"Code seven, code seven! All employees please remain where you are."

"What's a code seven?" Thirteen asked Cameron as they sat down at the little table in the hospital café.

"Code pink-so a missing baby. We're under lockdown." Cameron replied blankly, eager to dig into her dinner.

"Are you fucking kidding? We could be here all night!"

Cameron looked up at her,

"Better eat your dinner slowly then. Hey look, there's Wilson!"

Thirteen looked up and saw him smiling at them and noticed Cameron waving him over out of the corner of her eye.

"Hello ladies." He said as he pulled up a chair to the small table and sat with them.

"How have you been Wilson?" Thirteen asked him lightly.

"Pretty well, you?"

She shrugged,

"Good I guess."

Silence fell over them and Cameron took another bite of her food.

"So…now what?" Thirteen asked them, already bored.

Wilson paused,

"Truth or dare?"

"Oh no, you don't want to play with me. Truth or dare queen over here."

Cameron raised her eyebrows at Thirteen's bold-and probably accurate-statement.

"Yeah sure. Besides, I'm sure we can find a way to pass the time that doesn't involve a childish game."

Thirteen nodded, knowing that he would give up. Wilson resigned and sighed,

"Truth or dare?"

Cameron shot him a look,

"Seriously guys?"

"Do you have any better ideas?" Thirteen retorted gently.

Cameron sighed,

"Truth."

Thirteen smiled, satisfied.

"What was the worst part of working for House?"

Cameron thought for a minute,

"At first, it was being treated like an object by everyone on the team, not being noticed for having valuable input or legitimate knowledge. Then…I guess it was finding yourself acting like House without even thinking about it."

Wilson nodded, then turned to Thirteen,

"Truth or dare?"

"Dare." She replied confidently.

Wilson looked off into space, pretending to come up with an obscure dare when in reality he'd had one for her all along. He turned to Cameron, then back to Thirteen,

"I dare you to kiss Cameron." He'd heard rumors about the two being in a relationship, but he didn't know what to believe anymore.

She shrugged then turned to Cameron. The brunette cupped Cameron's cheek and they leaned into one another and shared a short but sweet kiss. Cameron so wished they were in private so that they could keep going, but sadly that wasn't the case.

Wilson raised his eyebrows,

"For once, House wasn't lying to me."

Cameron blushed and Thirteen let out a small laugh, before turning to her girlfriend

"Allison, truth or dare?"

Cameron didn't know what to pick-a truth was lame but she knew that Thirteen would make her do something crazy.

"Um…dare."

A flash of mischief surge through Thirteen's eyes, and Cameron knew she was in for it.

"I dare you to tell me why you got arrested in high school."

Cameron's heart stopped-the incident had happened over a decade ago and she'd been let off with a warning and a sealed record.

"Public intoxication. I was high and drunk and thought I could walk home from this party-I couldn't. A cop found me sitting on a street corner over two miles away from my house. They only tested me for alcohol with a breathalyzer test, but he knew I was high too. Guess he took pity on me."

Thirteen's jaw was dropped and Wilson was frozen-neither of them could believe that the squeaky clean, sweet, and morally-centered young woman sitting in front of them was a party girl as a teenager.

"Damn." Thirteen was slightly turned on and incredibly impressed.

"You're lying." Wilson accused her.

"No, I'm not." Cameron replied-she wasn't, and she'd figured one of them wouldn't believe her, "It was a party for the end of the basketball season-I was dating one of the guys on the team. I drank lots of beer and vodka and smoked almost a whole bowl of weed myself."

Wilson nodded, believing her.

Thirteen turned to Wilson,

"Truth or dare?"

He knew that a dare with Thirteen was risky,

"Truth."

"Are you seeing anyone?" Thirteen cocked an eyebrow as the question left her lips.

"Not currently, no."

"Interesting, you added a modifier." She added a fake-suspicious tone to her voice.

Cameron chuckled and turned to Thirteen,

"Truth or dare Remy?"

Thirteen figured she'd start out safe,

"Truth."

Cameron didn't even have to think about a question,

"How old were you the first time you slept with a girl?"

Thirteen smiled at her girlfriend's curiosity,

"Sixteen. Seventeen for a guy."

Wilson ignored his gut telling him that it was TMI,

"Truth or dare?"

"Dare-no nudity."

"Yes nudity!" Wilson retorted, causing her to roll her eyes, "I dare you, to show your breasts…to Taub."

Thirteen stared him down,

"That is the most ridiculous dare ever! Have you ever played this game? A dare is in the future, so sure I'll show my breasts to Taub-I'm honor bound. But I could do it tomorrow, or next year."

Wilson realized why she was the queen-she was good.

"Truth or dare?" Thirteen asked Cameron.

* * *

Over two hours passed, and they were still playing.

"Truth." Thirteen was sufficiently bored, but she figured Wilson could come up with something.

"Have you ever had a threesome?"

Cameron rolled her eyes.

"Seriously? What just because I'm bisexual?"

Wilson looked guilty,

"Well…yeah."

Thirteen sighed and sat back,

"No. Although, you didn't ask if I've had a foursome."

Wilson's eyes widened and Cameron laughed, although she stopped when her phone buzzed.

"So I just got a text from Foreman that says, _"How many Vicodin is too many?"_…I guess he and Taub are having fun."

Thirteen smirked and Wilson's eyes widened even further.

"Code seven has been lifted, thank you for your patience. Code seven has been lifted." Thirteen sighed out of relief as the voice came on over the intercom.

"Let's get out of here." Wilson said and they all rose.

They headed upstairs and parted ways.

"Goodnight Allison, Remy." Wilson called out to them.

"Goodnight James." They responded in unison.

"Interesting night." Taub commented as he came into the hospital.

Without warning, Thirteen opened her button-down shirt, flashed Taub, and closed it back up and stepped into the night with Cameron by her side.

"Remy! Oh my god!"

Thirteen glanced at her girlfriend,

"What? I was honor bound!"


	15. Next Level

**A/N: Well this chapter was easy to write. It's NSFW, so if you don't like it, don't read it! I'm emphasizing the M rating here okay.**

**Disclaimer: I mean secretly this really happened on the show so yeah it's all on Fox**

* * *

_'Intimacy is being seen and known as the person you truly are."_

_-Amy Bloom_

* * *

"Tomorrow marks three months." Thirteen spoke softly as she stroked Cameron's hair.

"What's that?" Cameron turned her head slightly to the left so she could make eye contact with her girlfriend.

"Tomorrow marks three months since the start of this…of us."

Cameron sighed contently,

"Wow. That's kind of crazy."

Thirteen nodded,

"Yeah. We should do something."

Cameron sat up, lifting her head out of Thirteen's lap, and cocked an eyebrow at her,

"Really?"

Thirteen shrugged,

"Yeah, I mean why not? Tomorrow is a Friday night and even though I know it's not a real anniversary it would be nice to go out and do something together."

Cameron did like the sound of the two of them sharing a nice evening together,

"Okay, that does seem sweet."

Thirteen smiled and leaned to kiss Cameron on the cheek, then the lips. They stopped and Thirteen glanced at her watch,

"Alright, I better go home. I'll see you-"

"Remy, wait. Please stay?"

Thirteen was surprised at Cameron's tone, which was full of need.

"Of course. What do you want to do?"

She sat back down on the couch next to the blonde, curious.

"I just wanted to do more of this."

Cameron smiled a little before pressing a deep kiss to Thirteen's lips. The brunette felt that same twist in her stomach.

"Let's go to bed." She whispered, and Cameron knew exactly what she was saying.

_'__Finally.'_

The blonde took her hand and they eagerly headed for the bedroom.

Cameron lifted her shirt as Thirteen stood behind her and undid the brace for the blonde's ribs-the last one she'd have to wear, and she only needed it for a couple more weeks.

Thirteen gently set the brace on the floor then turned her attention back to her girlfriend. She brushed Cameron's hair off to one side and planted a kiss on her neck, then another on her pulse point. A small moan of pleasure erupted from the blonde's throat,

"Don't stop."

Thirteen moved her hands down Cameron's sides, then to the front of her lower abdomen. Cameron shuddered out of shock and pleasant surprise as Thirteen's right hand slid under the front of her underwear, and she was instantly turned on. She turned around and pressed longing kisses to Thirteen's lips, and the brunette responded hungry yet gentle. Cameron took Thirteen's wrist and backed up into the bed until she felt it against the back of her knees, then allowed herself to fall, bringing Thirteen down with her, not breaking their kisses the whole time.

"Teach me." Cameron whispered into the brunette's ear as she moved to place kisses on the blonde's collarbone.

"Gladly." Thirteen flashed a devilish smile and proceeded to pull her shirt over her head, tossing it in a random direction. She went back to Cameron, willing for her to allow her own top to come off by gently tugging at it as she planted more kisses on the smaller woman's lips. Cameron arched her back then lifted her shoulders as Thirteen guided the shirt over her head. The brunette dove right back in, slowly trailing her left hand down the blonde's torso and entangling her right into Cameron's soft hair. Cameron willed for Thirteen to stop teasing and just go for it, but she knew that wouldn't happen. Thirteen slipped her left hand so that it was sandwiched between Cameron's lounge pants and her underwear, immediately feeling the warmth from her center. She placed light pressure but placed most of her focus on Cameron's reactions. It took all her will to not laugh as Cameron freed her hands to slip her pants off, hot and frustrated.

"What happened to slow and gentle?" Thirteen smirked as the blonde threw her pants across the room.

"Fuck Remy, kiss me."

Thirteen was turned on by Cameron's assertiveness and picked up where she left off. She moved further down Cameron's center and felt wetness seep through the blonde's panties. She stopped applying pressure and took off her own pants, then proceeded to unhook Cameron's bra. She started leaving a trail of kisses down Cameron's tiny body, starting at her lips, then her pulse point, then her neck, collarbone, right breast, naval, and finally inner thighs. As the brunette reached her destination, she tugged Cameron's panties down her long legs and dropped them off the edge of the bed. She immediately started sucking and kissing the blonde's center, causing a "purr" of pleasure to leave the blonde's mouth. Thirteen lightly brushed Cameron's whole body once again as she went back to kissing the blonde's mouth and slipped two fingers into the older woman.

"Shit Rem!" Cameron squealed and Remy smiled, pleased to make the blonde squirm.

Thirteen started getting to work, applying pressure to different pleasure spots until she found the ones that made Cameron release her flexed muscles out of relief. Cameron rocked her hips in rhythm with Thirteen, willing for the tension in her stomach to release. Thirteen felt Cameron's hands reach behind her and plant themselves into the small of her back and right on the line between the start of her bottom and the end of her waistline. Even through the waistband of her panties, she could feel the blonde's nails digging into her, and she knew that the spot on her back would have a few marks. Thirteen felt Cameron flex one more time before her body finally let out a release, and as Thirteen removed her hand from inside the blonde, she felt the same need Cameron had been experiencing arise in her own stomach. Cameron panted as the orgasm surged through her body, resulting in dizzying euphoria. She smiled up at the brunette and flipped her so that she was under the blonde,

"My turn."

The first thing she did was remove Thirteen's bra, and unlike her girlfriend, she didn't tease. She yanked Thirteen's underwear off and planted kisses on top of the brunette's lower lips before slipping a tongue into her. Thirteen gasped as sparks rose in her skin while Cameron slithered her arms around Thirteen's thighs, increasing their friction and intensifying Thirteen's rhythm. Thirteen was surprised at how good Cameron was for a first time.

_'__Like a 100 out of 10.'_

The blonde was careful yet eager to please the woman she loved, and she smiled into the brunette's center as she felt the younger woman start to contract around her. She moved back up to look Thirteen in the eyes as she slipped a finger into the younger woman and watched her expression as she came to orgasm. Thirteen arched her back and felt her pleasure intensify as Cameron sucked on her collarbone. She finally felt her body relax, and Cameron moved to curl up into the brunette.

"Allison, that was _amazing_."

Cameron smiled at her as they slid under the covers of the bed,

"Well, I have the best teacher."

Thirteen felt tears sting her eyes,

"Allison Cameron, I love you so very much."

Cameron felt her heart swell as the brunette started to cry tears of joy,

"I love you too Remy."

With that, Thirteen's cries intensified.

"Remy, sweetie, why are you crying?"

Thirteen looked her dead in the eyes,

"I just can't believe a heart as pure and beautiful as yours loves someone like me."

Cameron's heart broke,

"Remy, I always have and always will love you-no matter what-and don't you ever forget it."

Thirteen closed her eyes and leaned into the blonde, pressing a kiss to her forehead. For the first time in nearly fifteen years, she fell asleep happy.


	16. Little Things

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry it's been awhile! I really don't have any unique excuse...so yeah. Heh. **

**Disclaimer: Even though it's been awhile the answer is still no.**

* * *

_"Love is a passion which kindles __honor into noble acts."_

_-John Dryden_

* * *

Remy woke to Allison's lips on her cheek,

"Mm, good morning."

"Morning. How'd you sleep?"

"Best sleep I've had in a long time." A sleepy smile came to the brunette's face and she turned around so she was facing Allison.

"Good. I was just about to get up and take a shower, care to join me?"

A rush of energy surged through Remy's body and she sat up in bed,

"Yes please."

Allison laughed at her girlfriend's excitement, and they both shoved the covers off themselves and made way for the bathroom, not bothering to cover their naked bodies.

* * *

When Allison stepped out of the shower, the smell of bacon immediately wafted into the bathroom and made her stomach growl.

'_So that's what she's been up to.'_

Remy had gotten out of the shower before Allison was even done washing her hair-granted they'd been doing things besides showering-and instructed her to stay in the shower for ten minutes after she was finished.

The blonde wrapped a soft towel around herself and proceeded to step into the bedroom and pull on some clean clothes. After working a brush through her wet, knotted hair, she opened the door and smelled pancakes along with the bacon. When she stepped into the kitchen, Remy was standing over a pan with sizzling bacon cooking in it and another with pancakes.

"Wow Rem, I'm impressed."

Remy looked up at her and flashed a smile,

"I have a few tricks up my sleeves."

Allison stepped further in and wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist,

"Oh believe me, I know."

Remy chuckled and turned her head so she could place a kiss on the blonde's temple,

"This will be ready in about five minutes. Go ahead and grab whatever else you want from the fridge and set it on the table."

Allison proceeded to the fridge and took orange juice and strawberries-Remy's favorite fruit-and placed them on the breakfast table off the kitchen.

"Sit." Remy called as she flipped the last of the pancakes onto a plate.

Allison did as she was told and eyed Remy as she gracefully made her way to the table with plates of food balancing in her hands.

"Mmm, this smells delicious Rem."

Remy smiled and took a seat,

"Dig in!"

* * *

Remy sighed as she ran her fingers through Allison's soft curls,

"Well, we should probably finished the dishes."

The blonde giggled, her bare chest pressing further into Remy's rib cage. She whipped her head so she was looking up at her girlfriend, pleasure still rippling in her blue-green eyes,

"How about we just avoid all our responsibilities for the rest of the weekend?"

Remy smiled at the idea,

"I wish, but I made plans for us tonight. We should finish the dishes and then relax until it's time to go."

Allison sat up so she was straddling Remy once again, they thin green throw blanket that bad been covering them now sliding down and pooling at her hips. Remy took in the sight, and felt an urge to kiss the blonde once again. The same glimmer of fire showed itself in Allison's eyes again, and Remy realized what she was doing,

"Allison Marie, are you trying to seduce and distract me _again?_"

Allison smirked,

"Maybe. Don't tell me you don't like it."

Remy smiled and leaned forward, her arms automatically wrapping themselves around her girlfriend's tiny waist,

"I can not tell a lie."

They met for a kiss, Allison smiling into it, before Remy remembered that they really did need to finish their chores and start to relax. Regretfully, she broke the kiss first, and they slid off the couch, tugging their clothes back on, before returning to the kitchen.

* * *

"Remy, I swear to god if there's something gross in here I will actually kill you."

Remy laughed at Allison's comment,

"Don't worry, I think you'll love it."

In the past twenty minutes Remy had driven them back to her place, and before allowing Allison to step into her apartment, placed her hands over the blonde's eyes and guided her into the bedroom.

"Okay, open."

Remy removed her hands and Allison's eyelids flew open. Her mouth dropped as she saw what was in front of her. There, hanging from the door of Remy's closet, was what was probably the most beautiful red dress she'd ever seen.

"Remy…I…wow. Is it for me?"

Remy nodded as Allison turned around to meet her eyes.

"Thank you, it's beautiful."

Remy smiled and pressed a kiss to her cheek,

"Go ahead and change, I'm going to get ready and then we need to head out."

Allison felt herself blushing as she carefully took the dress with her into the bathroom. She looked around at the makeup Remy had laid out for her to use and got to work, trying to calm her nerves as she worked powder into her skin and swept mascara onto her eyelashes. She heard a soft knock on the door as she was zipping her dress up,

"Allie, are you ready?"

"Yeah, just a minute!"

She swept her curls onto her right shoulder, zipped the dress up the rest of the way, and slid into the nude pumps that she'd found next to the shower. She took a deep breath and opened the door, gasping as she took in the sight in front of her. Remy was wearing a strapless, tight, navy dress that stopped just above the knee of her long legs. She had curled her hair and done a cat-eye look for her makeup. She looked regal and sexy as hell.

"Wow, Rem you look absolutely stunning."

Remy blushed and took Allison's hand,

"You're the one to talk!"

Allison giggled as Remy spun her around and pulled her close. Allison pressed a kiss to Remy's lips and sighed, beyond content and excited for the rest of the night.

"Let's get going."

* * *

Allison's eyes widened as they pulled up to the sweet Italian restaurant,

"_Eno Terra_? Rem this place is supposed to be amazing!"

Remy smiled as they slid out of the car,

"All my friends recommended it, and I know you love Italian."

Allison took her hand after the car was locked and they made their way into the warm atmosphere.

"Reservation for two under Hadley at seven."

The hostess confirmed Remy's reservation and gestured for them to step past the threshold. She gathered up two menus and led them through the restaurant until they arrived at a small table for two complete with a candle in the middle.

"Your server will be right with you."

They took their seats and smiled at the hostess as she walked away. Remy slowly nudged the wine list to her girlfriend,

"You pick-whatever you want."

Allison picked it up and studied it, eventually finding herself torn,

"Rem, I can't pick between this 2004 Pinot Noir or the '06 Merlot."

Remy thought for a minute, pretending to drag it out longer to tease the blonde.

"Rem! I know you know what you want!" Allison chuckled through her words and gently shoved Remy's arm, causing the brunette to laugh.

"Okay okay, go with the Pinot."

Allison put the wine list back down as a flush came to her cheeks, and suddenly they were interrupted by a soft male voice,

"Good evening ladies, my name is George and I'll be your sever this evening. May I start you off with something to drink?"

Allison looked up at him,

"Yeah, a bottle of the '06 Pinot Noir, please."

He smiles at her words,

"Very good choice. Do you need another minute to order?"

Both women nodded, and George went on his way.

A few minutes passed as they decided on what they wanted before George was back with the wine. He uncorked it, poured them each a glass, and took their orders.

"Such a lovely way to have girl's night out away from the husbands and boyfriends, yes?" He commented as he closed his notepad.

Remy dropped her jaw and Allison burst into laughter as he walked away,

"Yeah, something like that." Allison could barely manage to get the words out. Remy herself started to laugh but soon stopped as heads started turning towards them.

_'__This is going to be something.'_

* * *

As soon as the last bite of tiramisu was cleared from their shared plate, Allison and Remy leaned back and sighed, full and satisfied.

"That was _delicious_ Remy."

Remy tried her best to control her comments but couldn't help herself,

"Definitely the second best thing I've eaten in the last twenty-four hours."

Allison nearly choked on her water, and Remy laughed as the blonde's face turned a bright red,

"Remy! Oh my god!"

Allison furrowed her eyebrows as Remy's laughter only got harder,

"You think this is funny? What if someone-"

"Allie, chill. I think it's hilarious, and besides no one cares. Hell, there's hardly anyone here anymore."

She was right, they'd been there for almost two hours and the dinner rush had passed.

"Are you ready to go?" Allison brushed off Remy's comment. They-or rather Remy-had paid when George brought them their desert.

"If you are, then yes."

They stood, grabbed their things, and walked to the front with their fingers interlaced.

"Goodnight lad-"

George stopped himself when Remy planted a big kiss on Allison's lips as they walked through the front door, causing the pair to giggle.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't resist." Remy laughed as they slid into the car, glancing into the restaurant to see if the man was still standing there with his mouth gaping open.

"Don't be sorry, that was fucking hilarious! Did you see his face?"

Remy laughed harder and nodded as she tugged her seatbelt on and started the car up.

"Are you sure you're okay to drive?" Allison asked gently.

Remy nodded and motioned to the bottle in the back seat,

"We only drank half that bottle, and I had one less glass than you."

Allison relaxed and took in the night as they drove home, watching as stars became more visible as they made their way to the outer edge of the city.

* * *

"Did you have fun today?" Remy spoke softly as Allison's bare body nestled against hers, still covered in sweat and shaking with pleasure.

"Fun is an understatement. Thank you so much Remy."

Remy kissed her temple,

"Anything for you."

They were silent for a moment before Allison suddenly shot forward and started to dig through her purse which had been tossed next to the bed unceremoniously,

"Shit I almost forgot, I have something."

"Allie, please you don't have to-"

She stopped when Allison turned on the light and presented her with a flat black box.

Remy quirked an eyebrow,

"What is it?"

Allison sighed,

"Why don't you open it and see?"

Remy gingerly took it and slid the top off, a breath of amazement escaping her as she saw what was in it.

"Allison, oh my god. Thank you, I love it."

Allison smiled as Remy pulled the necklace out, examining the silver "R" and the tiny diamonds that were embedded in the metal.

"It's nothing, really."

Remy did the clasp behind her neck and admired how the letter fell on her chest,

"No it isn't."

Allison decided not to protest and simply leaned in for a kiss. She switched the light off as they fell into one another, ending up in a tangle of limbs, sheets, and love.


	17. Painful Memory Making

**A/N:** **Hello children I am SO sorry that it's taken me such a long time to update...I really don't have a good excuse aside from the fact that I've been on a very tight schedule. Also this chapter is very painful so I apologize. **

**Disclaimer: it's not even worth it anymore**

* * *

_"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and of unspeakable love."_

_-Washington Irving_

* * *

Allison stepped into Remy's apartment the following Wednesday, exhausted and ready to relax. She was caught off guard as she heard Remy's soft voice drifting from the bedroom.

_'__That's odd, she's not supposed to be home for at least another hour.'_

Remy's words became more distinct as she walked through the living room.

"Okay, yeah. I gotta go, call me tomorrow or…sometime this week. I love you too."

Remy hung up the phone as Allison stepped into the bedroom doorway. Remy's eyes were red-rimmed and she was curled up against her pillow in Allison's favorite blue sweatshirt.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

Remy's first instinct is to push her away, but she stops herself. _'No. This is Allison, you can trust her.'_

"Well, um…it's my brother. He…he" She starts to tear up again and her voice cracks, and before she knows it Allison's taken her into her warm embrace, rubbing gentle circles on her back and letting her ugly cry into her shoulder.

"How much time do you need off? I'll talk to Cuddy." Allison breaks the silence as Remy pulls her face away.

"I'm n-not sure. He wants me to…he _needs_ me to help him…Cam, he can't live anymore. I…I have to…"

"Euthanize him?" Allison finishes the sentence.

Remy simply nods and eyes her girlfriend,

"Hey, no offense but…why aren't you freaking out right now?"

Allison takes in a sharp breath,

"Well…I've done it before. I've euthanized someone…I killed a man."

Remy raises her eyebrows,

"What? Wa-was it your husband? Or…?"

Allison shakes her head,

"No. Actually, it was probably someone you've heard of-Ezra Powell."

"That was you? Oh my god, Allison…I've heard rumors and I know that the report says he just stopped breathing, but…wow. I didn't think that…well, I didn't know that you-"

"You don't think I'm capable of it." Allison puts together Remy's words for her, "It's okay, I didn't think I was either. I think about it almost every day. It definitely changed who I am, hell, it changed almost everything. It changed how I look at life, it changed my relationship with House, my career, what I wanted for myself…it's hard, but eventually you learn to look at yourself in the mirror and hate what you see a little less everyday. You'll cry, you'll pray to God even if you don't believe in him, you'll look at every person in your life and question why they think of you the way that they do, and you'll learn to fear yourself. It's not fun but I'll be here, I could even help, if you want. I obviously understand if you think that it's crossing the line, but if there's two of us then it'll be safer and won't look as suspicious and-"

"Absolutely not Allison. I don't think it's crossing the line but I will not allow you to risk your license, your entire career-fuck, your entire life-just to help me."

The blonde raises her eyebrows,

"Really Remy? It'll be so much easier with both of us, and I've already done this. Now that I know it's not a personal wall but a simple concern I'm in. I'll talk to Cuddy tomorrow and you need to take the rest of the week-at the very least-off."

* * *

They arrive at Saint Peter's hospital in New Brunswick on Friday afternoon. Allison drove, and she spent the entire drive eying Remy's tense body, willing for some sort of peace to be brought to them, but she knew that no amount of hoping or soothing would fix this.

"You ready?" Allison asks cautiously as they climb out of the car. Remy barely manages a nod, so Allison grasps her hand and they step into the spacious lobby. They get directions to Carson's room and head upstairs to it in silence. The hall where his room is located is dark and quiet, and Allison can feel the sadness that flows from each room. She gets a rush of chills as they approach his room. Remy takes a deep breath and steps in,

"Carson? It's Remy, I'm coming in."

They're met with a smiling face as she pushes back the curtain,

"Well th-there's my beautiful si-sister!"

Remy lights up instantly as she sits on the bed and takes him into a tight hug, not caring that he's violently rocking side to side and can barely pull his own arms around her small torso. Allison has flashbacks of her husband's slow death as cancer took over his brain. His screams of pain from headaches, seizures, and eventual inability to control any of his movements have left her scarred forever. Like Carson, her husband had also had trouble speaking towards the end, as well as muscle weakness and severe mood changes. It had been hell, and she hated that Remy was now watching something very similar happen to her own brother.

"Is th-this your beautiful girl?" Carson's gaze shifts and Allison snaps out of her memories, and she feels herself tear up as she flashes a smile,

"Hi, I'm Allison. It's nice to finally meet you, I've heard wonderful things about you."

An uneven smile lights up his face,

"D-ditto. I h-hear you've been t-taking really good care of m-my sister. Th-thank you."

A tear rolls down her cheek and Remy sniffles,

"I love her, very much, I'll be taking good care of her for a really long time."

He nods as best as he can, and then something changes in his eyes,

"So wh-when are we taking care of b-business?"

Remy's eyes cloud over yet again,

"Whenever you want." She rubs his arm and her voice is solemn yet calm.

"Tomorrow." He answers immediately.

"Carson…are you sure?" Remy's voice cracks and her eyes water up.

"One hundred p-percent. S-saturday is the best d-day after all."

She nods and turns to Allison,

"We better write those prescriptions before the pharmacy closes."

Allison's eyes widen,

"Prescriptions? Rem, I thought we were filing this as a voluntary euthanasia and getting morphine…"

Remy shakes her head,

"Too messy. It's much easier just to write prescriptions and administer them ourselves. Normally if just one of us were to prescribe the amount of morphine we're going to, we would get caught and go to prison for over-prescription, but with two of us…trust me, it's easier."

Allison nods,

"Okay. I uh…I'm going to get some air, I'll give you two some time alone."

She vomits into the trashcan the second she steps into the courtyard, and she's shaking violently as sobs rip through her tiny frame. She hates this, it's bringing up all the pain from her past, but Remy is more than worth it.

_'__Get over yourself and stop being so fucking selfish. Man up, do this, and deal with your feelings later._'

She stands up, wipes her tears, and begins to walk around to clear her head. She couldn't be weak, not now.

* * *

Allison steps into the room after Remy gives her the all-clear that they're ready, the vial of morphine in her hand feeling like the heaviest weight she'd ever carried. Remy motions for her to go first. She takes out the needle, sucks all the morphine into it, and takes a deep breath before pushing the plunger into Carson's IV. His body immediately relaxes and his eyes start to close. Remy is ready and dives right in, just wanting for this horrible day to be over. They watch as his vitals drop and eventually stop. Remy's body shakes as tears pour down her face, and Allison turns off the monitors before carefully placing a hand on her girlfriend's shoulder.

"Thank you." Remy squeaks as she leans into Allison's touch. Allison mentally hoped that Carson was finally in a better place, and that Remy would let her grieve properly. She knew it was less than likely to happen, but she had to have _some_ faith.

'_I'm so sorry.'_


	18. Wanting to Forget

**A/N: Hey chickadees! Sorry it's been awhile since I've updated, but never fear, I have arrived with yet another oh so lovely and happy chapter! Ha, I fooled you for a minute there, didn't I? I'm enforcing the rating here.**

**Disclaimer: Why do I even bother.**

* * *

_"Not feeling anything is an attractive option when what you feel sucks."_

_-Emma Swan_

* * *

The next evening they arrived back at Allison's place, ready to forget everything.

"Shots?" The blonde asked over her shoulder as Remy settled down on the floor between the couch and the coffee table.

"Yup. Vodka." Remy answered softly as she felt a shudder rip through her body.

Allison sighed as she joined Remy, pouring clear liquid into two shot glasses. Without a word, they cheers each other and down their shots, immediately enjoying the burning sensation of the alcohol as it makes way down their throats. They sat in silence for a minute before Remy finally spoke up,

"What happened to you?"

Allison glanced at her, puzzled,

"What? What do you mean-"

"Allison, I love you, but you are one of the most detached and fucked up people I've ever met. I thought I was secretive, but I've realized that I'm probably one of maybe three people that actually knows more than five facts about you. So, what happened to you? I know about your husband _but what actually happened_?"

Allison felt a twinge in her stomach-Remy was right. She pushed people away because whenever she got close something would happen and she would be left in a tailspin of pain and suffering. She'd finally realized this after her husband's death, and ever since then she was kind but cold, compassionate but detached, and loving but guarded.

"I got hurt. All my life, people have been temporary so over time I've learned not to get invested. I've always been alone. My husband was the last person I let myself get attached to. After he died…I didn't know what to do with myself. I was too young to be a widow but there I was. I'm afraid, Remy. I told myself I wasn't good enough for anyone to love because I'm too broken…too damaged. I've hated myself for so long that I never thought I could truly love anyone…but now I have you, and for the first time in years, I've forgotten what hating myself feels like."

A tear streamed down Remy's cheek as she leaned into Allison,

"So…what about me? Have you let yourself get attached to me?"

She felt Allison nod and her heart grew heavy. She gulped,

"Cam, what's going to happen after I die?"

"I'll probably kill myself. I know it sounds crazy and cliché and like some Romeo and Juliet bullshit but honestly Remy I don't think I could handle the pain."

Remy turned to her,

"I'm sorry…you know if I could change it, I would."

Allison's blue-green eyes were now tear-filled and Remy knew she was trying not to cry for the younger woman's sake. Allison turned to the liquor on the table and her hand shook as she poured them each another shot. They downed the shots in silence, and Allison began to shake even more,

"Remy, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that you've had to watch your mother and now your brother die because of this god-awful disease. I'm not going to feel sorry for myself because self-pity is weak and I'm really fucking sick of being seen as weak. I promise to love you and be there for you until the very end, okay? I'm going to make sure you die happy and loved and that you won't feel alone because oh my god is it the worst feeling in the world, and no one as amazing as you should ever feel that way." Her whole body was shaking now and she had taken a tight hold of Remy's wrist, never wanting to let go. Tears were now making their way down Remy's face,

"I love you Allison, so much. Thank you, and I'm sorry, but you aren't alone anymore-you don't have to be. I'll love you for as long as I possibly can, I promise."

Something surged in Remy, and before she knew it she had Allison pinned under her, her warm mouth leaving feverish kisses all over the blonde's neck.

"Rem, are you sure you want to…like this?"

"Shh, I want to forget, to lose myself in you." Remy struggled for breath as she barely managed to get the words out between kisses.

'_Might as well go for it.'_ Allison so badly wanted to push on the brunette and flip their positions, but she knew Remy needed this temporary power-but just this once. Remy brought her knee to Allison's already warm center, which evoked a moan from the older woman. They ended up in a naked mess as they tried not to run each other into the coffee table or the couch. Allison felt the rug burn her a couple times, but she didn't care, the pleasure Remy was causing her was more than enough of a distraction. By the time they had both orgasmed not once but twice, they were exhausted and glistening with sweat. Allison was gasping for breath when suddenly Remy stood up and walked away.

_'__What the hell?'_

Remy was usually very clingy and vulnerable after sex-much unlike her usual self- and she always insisted she and Allison stay tangled together for hours on end.

"Remy? Come back!"

The door to the bedroom closed, and Allison knew she should follow Remy. She tugged her shirt and underwear back on, and grabbed Remy's own shirt. Allison reached the bedroom door and knocked lightly before walking in. Remy was standing there with her hand over her face, and Allison knew that she was crying.

"Hey, talk to me, what's wrong?" Allison took the taller woman into her arms and let her cry into her shoulder for a minute before they drew apart slightly. Remy took a breath,

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have used you like that-it's not fair. You deserve better."

Allison looked her in the eye,

"Hey, it's okay, really. I know, that…when things get tough for you, you need distractions. If I'm that distraction then so be it, in fact I'd rather be your distraction than anything else, understand?"

Remy nodded and took Allison in for another hug.

'_Get a hold of yourself.'_ Remy cursed herself in her head-what the hell was she doing? She couldn't get into this again-substance abuse, using people for sex, the last time she had it had nearly come at the price of her job, perhaps even her career. Allison would keep her stable, and Remy had to let herself rely on the blonde.

"I'm here, it's okay now." The blonde's gentle words were muffled, but they still warmed Remy's heart.

'_It's okay now.'_


End file.
